Has Your Relationship With Social Media Become Toxic? Sad Girls Club Founder, Elyse Fox, Has on Advice on Cutting Comparison

Comparison is the thief of joy, and when you are on the path of entrepreneurship, comparing yourself to others comes easily. 

As the founder of mental health platform, Sad Girls Club, Elyse Fox, knows all about comparison. Building something from the ground up is no easy feat, and in an age of social media and doom scrolling, Fox has fallen into the rabbit hole of comparison many times.

Fox, who is also a filmmaker and writer, created her nonprofit, to provide resources and online community for girls battling mental illness. She sat down with Les Alfred, host of She’s So Lucky, to discuss her entrepreneur journey. She gets real about her struggles with depression, comparison, and the fear of asking for help. It’s time to unpack and dismantle comparison, and make space for growth and compassion.

Stepping into entrepreneurship 

After working in the film and production industry for years, Fox felt dissatisfied with her career. Ultimately, she decided to leave the comfort of her 9-to-5 and took a risk to launch her own business. Her first company, Produced By Girls, was a film production company that produces films for women, by women. 

After launching Produced by Girls, Fox’s mental health journey inspired her to launch Sad Girls Club. It started with a short film, Conversations With Friends, about her experience with depression—how there’s no “face” to depression and how you can’t tell who might be struggling with it. From there, the Sad Girls Club was born— the positive response flourishing into an online community and in-person events. 

The power of asking for help

While Fox enjoyed building the Sad Girls Club, it was a lot to juggle. She needed help running the business while also managing her own mental health. Fox knew she had to let go of her ego and ask for help from her community. 

“I met some great women who actually offered to help, and I desperately needed it. I had to take my ego out of the work I was doing. If I want to heal all these women and heal my community, I was going to need a lot of support. I needed backup,” she explains. 

When it comes to asking for help, it starts with letting people know you need it. Be clear and explain how they can help you. “People need a specific call-to-action. When I receive a specific call-to-action from a friend, I am so happy because it’s so concise. I know exactly what they need.”

A lot of the pressure and stress you feel to succeed is self-imposed. When you get out of your own way, that’s when fruitfulness, connection, and support happen. “I always wanted to show people I could do things by myself. But who am I proving that to besides myself? No one is telling us these things. It’s our own head and our mind,” Fox says.

How to avoid comparison 

For entrepreneurs, it’s important to define success on your own terms. The comparison game is real, but Fox encourages us to look inward for our internal markers of success. “We play the comparison game, but that’s their version of success. You shouldn’t mirror your success off someone else. They can be inspiration or even someone to uplift you as you are growing,” she says. 

To eliminate feelings of comparison, Fox is a big proponent of the mute button on social media. “I have to mute so many people that I love. I have such a great social circle of incredible women, but sometimes, I do fall into the hole of comparison,” she admits.

Another tool Fox uses to cut comparison is to fill her time with joy. Whether it’s going for a walk outside, exercising at the gym, or going on a TikTok binge, Fox disconnects from work mode and focuses on play. “I try to pull myself out of my own head by removing myself from the space that I am currently in, whether physically or mentally, and taking myself somewhere that feels like home,” she explains. 

Tips for leaders on personal growth 

When it comes to being a successful entrepreneur, Fox says it’s important to try out new things and get outside her niche. “Women often fall into the trap of doing one thing, and it becoming who you are. We are not a monolith. We do so many other things in our lives. Success for me is doing whatever I need to do for the betterment of Elyse,” she advises.

Read Next

• How to Journal for Mental Health
• Emma Grede, the $1B Brand Architect, on Transforming Celebrity Businesses and Ignoring Career Advice
• Before the Kardashians: How Yris Palmer Built Her Lash Empire with $500