Amanda Batula Opens Up About Depression: How the ‘Summer House’ Star Found Her Way Back

Amanda Batula, the once-effervescent, effortlessly cool girl from Summer House, recently revealed on the Conversations with Cam podcast that she’s been depressed. And not just feeling temporarily down—we’re talking real, clinical, “I almost skipped Thanksgiving because packing was too much” depression.

From Bravo Babe to Burnt Out

Let’s rewind. Amanda entered the Summer House chat as Kyle Cooke’s on-again, off-again flame. They fought, they made up, they got engaged, and Bravo captured every tequila-fueled argument along the way. By the time she walked down the aisle, we assumed her life was a fairy tale. Spoiler: It wasn’t.

“I didn’t realize it until like January or February of that year,” Amanda told Cameron, referring to the post-wedding crash that blindsided her. “It does run in my family, so it is genetic. But what set it off was, and I didn’t realize this at the time, the post-wedding blues. I think I crashed so hard I never really bounced back from it.”

Post-wedding bliss? More like post-wedding existential crisis. One day you’re a bride; the next, you’re just… someone’s wife. Add the pressure of public scrutiny, internet trolls dissecting her every move, and the identity-suck of being the Loverboy mascot, and you’ve got a recipe for mental health disaster.

“I Was Okay with Dying”

Yes, Amanda went there. Not suicidal, she clarified, but numb. Too numb. “I was like, if I got in a car crash, I don’t know. I was okay with life just being done. And that was bizarre,” she admitted. 

Thanksgiving 2023 was her rock bottom. Amanda, the girl who lived for family holidays, almost skipped it entirely. “I don’t think I can do it. I don’t think I can pack. It’s too much,” she told her parents, sobbing into the phone. Instead of turkey and pie, she was ready to spend the holiday on her couch, marinating in misery. “That’s when I realized, oh shit, I think I need help.”

Enter Antidepressants, Exit Doom Spiral

Amanda’s first step toward healing wasn’t glamorous. It wasn’t a yoga retreat or a manifestation journal. It was a depression quiz on Hims & Hers. “I filled out the questionnaire thinking they’d say, ‘Oh, you’re fine.’ Instead, it said ‘You have severe depression.’ I was like, okay, damn.”

Antidepressants didn’t transform her overnight, but they gave her the capacity to care—about herself, her marriage, her friendships. “I want to go back and hug that girl,” she said, tearing up. “That little tiny pill changed my whole world.”

Beyond Loverboy: Finding Herself Again

One major realization: Loverboy wasn’t her dream. It was Kyle’s. And tethering her identity to her husband’s hard seltzer empire only deepened her funk. Enter By Batula, her swimwear line.

“It did exactly what I hoped it would do—get me out of bed,” Amanda said. Designing suits that actually fit women with bigger boobs and smaller waists gave her purpose beyond Kyle’s hustle. “It wasn’t a collaboration or me starting from scratch. It was a team helping me build a brand I actually care about.”

What’s Next for Amanda Batula?

Amanda’s not cured. Depression isn’t the flu—it lingers, shape-shifting and waiting for stress to lower your defenses. But she’s fighting back. “I’m doing things. I’m outside. I’m saying yes to stuff I actually want to do and no to things that drain me. I’m not perfect, but I’m better.”

As for babies? Hold your horses. “I was in such a dark place, I couldn’t take care of myself, let alone a child. Now that I’m happier, I still don’t feel rushed. I’ll freeze my embryos and cross that bridge when I’m ready.”

Depression doesn’t care if you’re pretty, married, and reality TV-famous. Amanda Batula learned that the hard way—and she’s owning it, tiny pill and all.

If you or someone you know is struggling with suicidal thoughts, help is available. Please reach out immediately to the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255.