Is It Me or My ADHD? Aurora Culpo Says You’re Not Alone

Is it you, or is it just your ADHD? That’s the question that Aurora Culpo, host of Barely Filtered, is exploring in a recent episode. It couldn’t be more relevant with the number of ADHD diagnoses in adult women nearly doubling from 2020 to 2022. The content creator and former reality TV star has been extremely open about her journey with ADHD—from cutting alcohol to help balance her symptoms, to fixating on thoughts or situations, to a lack of impulse control in her teenage years. 

“You think that these things are just kind of normal behaviors, but the more I start studying up on it, I realize that was my ADHD,” Culpo says. 

ADHD is underdiagnosed in adult women and girls, which is why Culpo is so inspired to continue to share her experience. On a recent episode of Barely Filtered, she shares about the ADHD symptoms that often leave her questioning herself and affect her confidence, her career, and her relationships. She also dives into her experiences with rejection sensitivity, hormone shifts, dating red flags, and why sometimes her brain just can’t let things go. 

ADHD Brain: How ADHD Affects Aurora Culpo’s Life

Overthinking

Culpo shared a story about a recent experience with another mom who gave her feedback about her son, Remi Berkeley. The mom told Culpo her son had been rude recently and that Remy taught her son to swear. Culpo immediately took responsibility, and she spoke to her son privately, who immediately denied it and got defensive.

A few days later, Culpo reflected and realized that her response was probably an ADHD response. “I feel like she knew it was her son causing these issues and, in an effort to make herself feel better, she had to tell me that my son is a bad influence,” Culpo explains.  

Culpo notices a pattern—when someone gives her feedback or criticism, she smooths it over and takes responsibility where she doesn’t need to. Then, she overthinks it and makes it a bigger deal in her head. “The more I think about that dynamic and what she said to me, the angrier I get and the more I spiral in my head,” she says. “This is something I always do.”

This phenomenon is best described as a working memory deficit. Culpo describes it as “having multiple tabs open in your brain.” “It’s when you are trying to manage the feelings of other people and yourself in a complex situation, and you feel like you can’t process it quickly enough to respond adequately,” she explains. “Then, you end up hardcore ruminating on it later.”

Impulsivity 

Another common symptom of ADHD is a lack of impulse control. Culpo admits that she can be snappy with the people who are closest to her. “No one would ever say Aurora is very nonconfrontational,” she laughs. “They’d say that I always speak my mind.”

Culpo says that for the people she is closest to, she can be impulsive with her reactions. “You respond very quickly without really taking into consideration the consequences or all of the parts at play,” she adds. “If I am in a situation where I feel like I am being disrespected by somebody who I know well, I most likely will be impulsive with my response.”

Rejection sensitivity dysphoria 

For people with ADHD, it’s very common to have hypersensitivity to rejection. In scientific terms, it is referred to as rejection sensitivity dysphoria, which Culpo describes as an extreme emotional reaction to rejection, criticism, disapproval, or failure, even if it’s subtle or entirely imagined.  

Culpo says this sensitivity to rejection shows up explicitly in dating. “You feel misunderstood, but for some reason, your self-worth is so wrapped up in their perception of you,” she says. “You almost have to work twice as hard in order for people to look at you like a valuable member of society.  

How to effectively manage ADHD symptoms

Culpo has adopted a few habits to help her deal with her ADHD symptoms. Here are a few:

• Label it in real time.
  For example, you might label your heightened reaction to something as rejection sensitivity dysphoria. Culpo says your brain is reacting before you’ve had time to check the facts. Ask yourself if your response is based on fact and how the situation makes you feel. “Oftentimes, the stories you are creating in your head, you don’t have the facts to back it up,” Culpo explains. “You have the choice to believe what you want in any given situation.”
• Talk to someone safe.
  Culpo finds this hack to be beneficial. “You just want someone to affirm you and commiserate your feelings,” she says. 
• Use body-based grounding tools.
  Culpo loves yoga to help her stay grounded. She also suggests practicing breathwork, getting a massage, or grounding your feet in the earth.
• Affirm yourself.
  Culpo encourages you to say words of affirmation to yourself like, “This reaction is valid, but it doesn’t mean I am bad,” or “I am allowed to take up space.”

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