Kelly Rizzo Says Her Grief for Late Husband Bob Saget Didn’t End When She Fell in Love Again

Four and a half years after losing Bob Saget, Kelly Rizzo is still figuring out what grief looks like. During a recent episode of Girls Gotta Eat, the wife of the late Full House star spoke about the parts people don’t always know how to talk about—the guilt that can come with dating again, the frustration of being asked “how are you?” while you’re barely functioning, and the strange feeling of becoming a widow at 42 when you still feel far too young for the word itself. 

She also looks back on the start of her relationship with Saget, including the DM that kicked everything off and why she initially thought the whole thing felt impossible to take seriously.

Below are the highlights from the conversation, adapted from the episode.

What was your first reaction when Bob Saget DM’d you?

“I’m in my ex-husband’s restaurant (because he’s a restaurant owner), he just happened to be sitting at my booth with my friends and me, just saying hi—we’re friends. And I remember he was sitting there and I was like, ‘Guys, Bob Saget just messaged me,’ and I remember my ex was like, ‘What? That’s weird.’ He’s like, ‘I gotta go.’ So he got up and left, but my girlfriends were like, ‘What? What?’ And I remember I was like, ‘Oh. That’s so weird. Like, I don’t even know what to say to him.’”

What was the DM he sent you?

“He said, like, ‘Hey, Kelly, I would love to invite you to a show and take you out for some burgers and lobsters,’ cause he saw I was like a foodie. And he’s like, ‘If that’s not too forward, best Bob Saget.’ He signed his Instagram message, Bob Saget, like all of our dads do. Best Bob Saget.”

Why were you hesitant to date him at first?

“I still felt like this is too removed for me. Like I’m a Chicago gal. Like, this guy who I used to watch when I was 10 years old at my grandma’s house, like on Sundays, watching America’s Funniest Home Videos. Like what? It was, it was too, it was too weird. But he was so unbelievably awesome and just chill and fun and quirky and neurotic and just all the things that you’d want him to be. And I was like, I can’t not give it a chance. Like he’s too wonderful and he really is nice.”

When did you realize you actually liked him?

“So he set me up on a couple of meetings, and then he’s like, ‘Can I take you out to dinner when you’re here?’ I was like, ‘I knew it.’ Like there was something, you had an ulterior motive…I was like, ‘You can come to dinner with me and my manager and her assistant.’ And so he came out to dinner with the three of us four nights in a row…And finally, by the last night, he’s like, ‘Look…I like you, and I just don’t feel like you’re attracted to me or that you like me in that way…’ And then it just hit me. I was like, I do like him. And I go, ‘Well, what if I am attracted to you? What, what if I do like you in that way?’ He goes, ‘What time’s dinner?’”

What did the first year of grief actually feel like?

“The first year was awful. It’s such an absolute change of everything in your life. Like everything’s different. And I mean your life goes like from this to this. It’s just turned upside down completely, and it’s just so disorienting.”

Did becoming a widow at a young age feel surreal?

“I remember saying to her, I was like, ‘I don’t have a husband anymore. So I’m like a widow? Like what? Like, but I’m young, like I like he was just here.’ It just didn’t make sense, you know?”

Did you ever feel pressure to ‘move on’?

“You really just learn that there are no rules. And there’s no, you’re not supposed to do anything. I mean, there’s some basic societal, like, OK, maybe don’t start dating somebody else a week later. You know, like there’s some things that are kind of universal where most people who are at least in a true loving relationship, that would not even be an option for them. But for the most part, you know, widows do get so much hate or grief for, let’s say, moving forward. I don’t even like to say moving on, moving forward.”

What helped you survive the darkest moments?

“My middle sister Kristen is 1000 times better than any therapist could be for me—she knows me better and really knew what to say and knew what to do…she slept in my bed with me for over a month right after, like she was there every minute of every day. And if it was not for her, if it was not for Bob’s daughters, if it was not for some of Bob’s best friends, I mean, I definitely would have not gotten through it.”

What’s something people say to grieving people that actually isn’t helpful?

“‘How are you’ over text? Let me say that over the phone, fine. But over text because I felt like now I have to write an essay…I was trying to give thoughtful responses to each person because I’m a people pleaser, and I felt like it was homework to get that question in a text.”

What was more helpful to hear instead?

“Do say, ‘Want to talk?’ Like, ‘Hey, do you want to talk?’ Like versus just saying, ‘How are you?’ Or ‘What did you do today?’ To me, that was so much more helpful, or like, ‘When can I come see you?’ Or ‘Was today better?’ ‘Was today worse?’ Like asking something specific was so helpful to me.”

How did you know you were ready to date again?

“I kind of put on myself that I said, ‘Ok, in terms of dating or moving forward, I’m like, I’m not even gonna think about that for one year’…I don’t want to say what’s like appropriate or not appropriate, but in a sense, anything before a year might be seen as a little too soon and then after a year, it’s a little bit more acceptable…

…And then I remember it was on the one-year anniversary of Bob passing on January 9th, 2023. And I had Jeff Ross and John Mayer over, and Bob’s nephew, Adam. And the three of them, it’s me on one side of the couch and the three of them sitting on the other couch. And then Jeff Ross goes, ‘Kel. Elephant in the room. We gotta talk about it. When you’re gonna start dating again?’ And I was like, ‘Jeff, like, I mean, I’m not really ready just yet.’ And John’s like, ‘You know, whenever you’re ready, but you know, it’s OK if you want to get back out there, like it’s OK…’

…So now, 14 months [after that], I started to feel a little lonely. And then you start to feel, after over a year of not having a hug or a kiss or feeling lonely. I’m like, ‘Oh, I don’t wanna feel like this.’ Grumpy old widow. Like, you start to feel like not young and hot anymore. And I’m like, ‘I want to feel alive again.’”

How did Bob’s daughters react when you started thinking about dating again?

“I sat down with Bob’s daughters and I said, just that like I’m starting to feel a little lonely, and they’re like, ‘Kelly. Like we want you to be happy, you don’t need our permission.’ I go, ‘I know I don’t need your permission, but I want your blessing.’ You know, and they’re like, ‘Of course. They’re like our dad would want you to be happy.’”

How did you meet your boyfriend, Breckin Meyer?

“18 months after is when I met Breckin, and Breckin and I, it’s been 3 years now, we’ve been together. It was the first person I dated…I met Breckin, and like from our first date, I mean, we didn’t say this to each other because we, you know, weren’t insane, but we were like, this is kind of it. I was like, ‘I don’t wanna go out with anyone else.’ And he was thinking the same thing even though it took us a while to process that, and we really paced it, and we took it very, very slow.”

To hear the full conversation, listen to Girls Gotta Eat wherever you get your podcasts.

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