‘We Met at Acme’ Pulled the Smartest Dating Advice on TikTok So You Don’t Have To

Nearly four years after her original TikTok dating advice episode, We Met At Acme host Linsdey Metselaar returns with a follow-up—and the app has only gotten louder since then. Metselaar spent hours sifting through the noise to find the advice that still holds up in 2025, and more importantly, the advice that actually helps you date with clarity instead of panic.

Below are the pieces of TikTok dating advice she thinks are worth keeping—and why they matter now more than ever.

‘We Met At Acme’ Breaks Down TikTok Dating Advice That Works

Keep your life full—it makes your relationship healthier

“Women who keep their lives full in relationships are in the happiest relationships,” one TikTokker shares, and Metselaar fully agrees. A relationship shouldn’t replace your life; it should fit into it. That means your friendships stay active, your hobbies stay yours, and your sense of self doesn’t get absorbed into someone else’s schedule.

She pushes back on the idea that being partnered automatically means being available 24/7. You’re with them because you want to be, not because you need them to fill every gap in your week. The couples who thrive are the ones who have their own worlds—their own trips, routines, friends, ambitions—and still choose each other. That balance keeps things interesting and prevents the dynamic where one person becomes the other’s entire emotional outlet.

Pick the person who lights up when you walk in

Metselaar loves the idea of choosing a partner the way you’d choose a puppy—not the fanciest or the flashiest, but “the one who’s happiest to see you.” It sounds cute, but it’s actually a really grounded way to think about compatibility. Enthusiasm is a sign of emotional availability, warmth, and genuine appreciation for who you are.

It’s so easy to get swept up in potential—the guy who’s impressive on paper, the woman everyone else wants, the person who feels like a “catch” because they’re hard to access. But Metselaar’s point is that admiration without kindness doesn’t build a relationship. A person who is thrilled to see you after a long day? That builds something.

And if they want to see you, you’ll know

One creator asks an older woman how they knew someone liked them back in the pre-texting era, and the answer was simple. “If they made plans with me and wanted to see me, they liked me.” Metselaar says the same rule still applies in 2025—even with all the apps, DMs, and “good morning” texts that don’t lead anywhere.

Effort is the tell. Interest shows up in the form of actual time together, not half-engaged check-ins. If someone is in your city and consistently isn’t making plans? “They’re not interested,” she states. And no, calling them “avoidant” doesn’t change the math. If you’re spending more time analyzing their attachment style than you are seeing them in real life, you already have your answer. The people who like you make room for you. They show up. They initiate. And they don’t leave you wondering whether you imagined the connection.

Don’t take on someone else’s problems

Everyone has history, insecurities, and areas they’re still working on. The issue is when someone’s unresolved chaos becomes your daily environment. If you’re constantly regulating their emotions, cleaning up the fallout of their decisions, or rearranging your life to accommodate their instability, you’re absorbing responsibility that was never yours.

Women are already carrying so much—mentally, emotionally, logistically—that taking on a partner’s unaddressed issues becomes a fast track to resentment. And if you’re asking yourself “But then who will date them?” that’s not your burden either. “If you are that guy who has all those problems, go fix yourself because we are always doing the work as women,” she adds.

Ditch the group chat

In the early stages of dating, the group chat is practically a co-pilot. You’re sending screenshots and trying to decode every small shift in tone. “You won’t have to text your best friend for advice when you’ve found the right person,” the advice reads. Metselaar agrees—not because your friends stop mattering, but because clarity replaces confusion.

In healthy relationships, you don’t need multiple opinions just to feel secure. You’re not polling your friends on whether that text sounded weird or whether you should suggest plans. The connection feels grounded enough that you can trust your own read on things.

For more TikTok dating advice with Metselaar’s stamp of approval, listen to We Met at Acme wherever you get your podcasts.

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