‘What We Said’ Has Thoughts on Traditions, Gifts, and the Myth of Stress-Free Holidays

If you’ve ever left a holiday gathering feeling irrationally annoyed by someone’s workout schedule, gift expectations, or overly curated Christmas aesthetic, this episode of What We Said will feel deeply validating. Hosts Jaci Marie Smith and Chelsey Jade Curtis kick off their festive “naughty or nice” episode by reacting to listener-submitted holiday hot takes—and quickly realize most of them boil down to one thing: rigidity versus connection.

What follows is less about declaring right and wrong and more about interrogating why certain holiday behaviors hit a nerve. And yes, they fully admit they’re hypocrites along the way.

Trying to keep your routine during the holidays

Verdict: Mostly naughty

One listener sparked a long (and very honest) debate by calling out how family members act “like you’re the villain” for sticking to routines over the holidays. Smith and Curtis see both sides—but ultimately land on flexibility over discipline. 

“I think rigidity really bothers me…it’s like, live literally, it’s so exhausting to be around,” Smith says, while Curtis adds that when routines start affecting everyone else, that’s when it crosses a line. “It feels selfish a bit…like the world revolves around me.” They acknowledge that boundaries matter, but when routines override shared time, they say it stops being about health and starts being about control.

Inviting someone who’s alone for Christmas 

Verdict: Case-by-case, leaning naughty

This one gets a quick, decisive reaction. “If I don’t like someone, you’re not coming to spend a holiday with me,” Smith says. Curtis agrees there’s a difference between extending warmth and forcing yourself into discomfort. While they respect the spirit of generosity, both draw a hard boundary when it comes to inviting someone you actively dislike.

Bigger families deserve more holiday time

Verdict: Naughty

“How is that math?” Curtis asks. Neither host seems to buy into this logic. They agree that family size shouldn’t dictate priority—and that this mindset unfairly penalizes smaller families without actually solving scheduling stress.

Stress-free holidays matter more than traditions

Verdict: Nice (with conditions)

This is where nuance kicks in. Curtis—who openly loves hosting and traditions—pushes back on the idea that holidays should be effortless. “I’m not gonna stop doing something just because it’s hard…it’s fulfilling.”

Smith, who’s historically less sentimental, admits motherhood has shifted her thinking. “I don’t care to have traditions that happen every year.” She still doesn’t care about repeating the exact same traditions, but she values creating meaningful experiences her child can recognize year to year. They’re in agreement: traditions should serve you—not trap you.

Asking someone to return or exchange a gift

Verdict: Mostly naughty

Unless something truly doesn’t fit or can’t be used, both hosts find it rude. “The act of giving a gift is the gift,” Curtis says. Gifts don’t need to last forever—and that appreciation doesn’t require keeping or monetizing everything you’re given.

Wish lists are ruining Christmas

Verdict: Split decision

Curtis feels strongly that wish lists kill the magic. “If you’re telling me exactly what to get you, why am I here?” she asks. Smith initially pushes back, especially from the perspective of limited finances, arguing that lists can be practical and stress-reducing when money is tight. But she ends up seeing Curtis’s point.

They agree it comes down to intention. Gifts should make the recipient feel seen, whether they’re practical or sentimental.

Trendy Christmas themes (think ‘Ralph Lauren Christmas’)

Verdict: Naughty

Both hosts side-eye the pressure to reinvent Christmas decor every year. “That is consumerism to the freaking max,” Curtis says. They praise timeless, collected decor—especially secondhand pieces—and argue that constantly chasing TikTok trends drains the meaning (and magic) out of the season.

To hear all of Smith and Curtis’ holiday opinions, listen to the latest episode of What We Said wherever you get your podcasts.

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