Lindsey Metselaar Shares Her PCOS Story to Help Other Women

The beauty of pregnancy and motherhood is that everyone’s path is unique. On Milk Drunk by Bobbie, host Tabria Majors interviews millennial dating expert Lindsey Metselaar about her journey to motherhood. Metselaar’s motherhood story, like many women’s, encompasses PCOS, IVF, and an emergency caesarean section. Although the path was not 100 percent perfect, and full of what, at that time, felt like obstacles, Metselaar is grateful for the journey that led her to her son, Zachary. 

Metselaar, a New York City-based mom, hosts the podcast We Met at Acme, works as a food influencer, and founded Don’t Expect Salads. She shares the story of why she had to get a blowout a week after delivering her baby, what she describes as “the best money she’s ever spent,” and the steps she takes to promote a health feeding journey for her and her son.

Discovering PCOS after birth control

In February 2022, when Metselaar and her husband decided to try for a baby, she got off birth control. Immediately, she began experiencing unusual symptoms—weight gain, acne breakouts, and hair loss. She also couldn’t get her period, “I was delusionally confident and thought I was pregnant. I never thought it could be something else. But six months in, I knew something was wrong because I had not ovulated,” she says. 

A visit to a fertility clinic showed that Metselaar had normal blood work results. After multiple attempts to induce ovulation, she and her husband sought a second opinion. “I went to a clinic and was told this is normal and to give my body a year to regulate,” she recalls. The new doctor quickly diagnosed Metselaar with polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS). 

PCOS affects the body’s ability to regulate hormones, and birth control can mask its symptoms. “What is so ironic about having PCOS is that birth control actually helps PCOS and masks its symptoms. It keeps them at bay. So I could not be on them anymore because I was trying to get pregnant,” she explains.

Metselaar encourages women to always get a second opinion, especially if you’re struggling with similar symptoms. “I think the first clinic recognized my PCOS, but they didn’t care that there was an underlying issue. They just wanted to treat what I came in for—to get pregnant.” 

The IVF experience

After her diagnosis, Metselaar and her husband chose IVF as their path forward. IVF can be a long and strenuous process, requiring progesterone injections, daily pills, and frequent blood draws. 

Metselaar started IVF in March 2024 and was fortunate that the first embryo transfer was successful. “But the truth is, no matter if the first or third transfer works, you still have to go through hell. No one wants to do it,” she says. Metselaar adds that she feels extremely lucky to have gotten pregnant on the first try and that she was able to do IVF (because she knows not every woman is able to).

An unplanned delivery and finding yourself after giving birth

Despite an easy pregnancy, Metselaar’s labor did not go as planned. She wanted to give birth at home with her doula and without an epidural. “I was going to breathe this baby out. Nothing went according to plan—it never does.”

Although she had an emergency C-section, Metselaar says she has no regrets. A year later, she gushes about her son, Zachary, who turned one in January.

Even though it was not a part of her birthing plan, Metselaar says that a C-section only has as much power as you give it. “Every friend who had a C-section previously advised me to get up and walk as soon as possible. So a week after giving birth, I went to get a blow out because I just needed to feel like myself. I pushed myself a little bit, and it helped me to recover quickly,” she says.

Building a wellness support system

Metselaar shares that her postpartum journey has been smooth. She credits that to her at-home nurse. “It was the best money I ever spent in my life. She is the most amazing woman who taught me so much. She knew how to do everything sensitively, from breastfeeding to weaning. I felt like I had an oracle helping me through.”

Metselaar emphasizes the ease of her first year to having a tribe: “You should not have to do it alone. It takes a village. Whether it’s your parents, your partner’s parents, your aunts, your uncle, your friends, there is no shame in not doing it alone.

Nutrition, exercise, and feeding choices

When it comes to feeding baby Zachary, Metselaar combined breastfeeding with formula. Her milk supply took time to establish, and she’s grateful for having Bobbie formula as an option. “This isn’t even a plug. My son loves Bobbie,” she says. 

While it’s great to hear positive postpartum stories, Metselaar says most of her experience came down to luck: “I was lucky that I had a baby who didn’t have issues with feeding. I had no idea what I was doing. I had a virtual lactation consultant. I had one boob producing way more than the other. My son hated the left boob but loved the right boob.”

Metselaar shares a few insights she wishes someone told her prior to giving birth—like how starting an exercise routine affected her milk supply, and how breastfeeding increased her nutritional needs dramatically: “It was crazy how much I needed to eat to sustain.” 

For more of Metselaar’s motherhood story, tune into Milk Drunk by Bobbie.