Comedian Whitney Cummings has no interest in performative parenting. When her son, Henry, turned one in December, she skipped the elaborate celebration that’s become a norm. Why spend all that money on a small human who won’t even remember it? Whitney, however, shares that she is grateful to have given birth at this stage of life and to be able be a mom at 40 years old after 20 years in Hollywood.
Currently on her comedy tour, The Big Baby Tour (a name that possibly was humorously inspired by postpartum), Cummings sat down with Amanda Hirsch on Not Skinny But Not Fat to discuss navigating life as both a new mom and touring comedian.
In pregnancy, protecting your peace means protecting your baby. Cummings approached pregnancy with thoughtfulness, diving into neuroscience, the female brain and epigenetic imprinting. “Whatever chemicals you emit in utero, your child will be addicted to,” Cummings explains, noting how maternal stress levels can shape a child’s neurochemistry.
Cummings avoided adrenaline and stress when she was pregnant, even if it meant avoiding stressful people. “I had to work really hard to not allow any stress or cortisol while I was pregnant,” she says. “So for like eight or nine months, I just chilled and kicked it.”
Although she did a good job protecting her peace, Cummings says it was the hardest part of pregnancy because there’s so much chaos in her life while she’s on tour.
Cummings obviously had to gush over her son Henry: “He’s like a celebrity to me; Like when I see him, and if there’s a babysitter with him and I’m in the other room, I’ll be like, ‘There he is!’”
She advocates for surrounding children with multiple positive influences and doesn’t get jealous over him. Even when they’re tiny and young, they know who their mom is and they can still like other people, Cummings adds.
“I get excited when he loves all the people in his life,” she says. “I pay the bills so I have some leverage here.”
Cummings shares that the Internet can be a baffling place when you’re a new parent. “They come for us about everything when you’re a mom,” she says. From sharing her child’s face to breastfeeding versus bottle feeding to the right bottle to use, every decision invites commentary.
Cummings tries to see it differently: “I like to look at it as, ‘Look at all these people who care about a child who they don’t know.’”
Once you’re a mom, you have so much information, she explains, acknowledging the double-edged sword of social media. Of course, you want to share. She balances leaning into the online village of moms while filtering out the trolls and the fear of cancellation. “Nothing can replace the wisdom of women,” Cummings says.
Hirsch and Cummings also delve into cancel culture, with Cummings offering her POV on recent controversies and whether cancelled celebs can make comebacks.
Sometimes, it’s just a losing battle. “I’m obsessed when someone’s apology gets them is what gets them canceled and they were actually doing okay until they apologized,” Cummings laughs.
If you want to hear more about Cummings motherhood journey, her time on Punk’d, or her evolving comedy career, tune into this week’s episode of Not Skinny But Not Fat.
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