Harry Jowsey Has a New Puppy and Dating Philosophy

Harry Jowsey wants you to know he’s different now. The former Too Hot to Handle star—who admits to being on “too many dating shows” to count—is taking an unexpected turn: he’s celibate and he wants to be husband material. No, this isn’t another reality show premise (although that’s a show we’d watch… Netflix, you should call us).

“My dad died and I was like, I’m not horny,” he tells Kristin Cavallari bluntly on Let’s Be Honest (out today). “As soon as I got back to LA, I’m like, I’m just sick of hanging out and like, ‘Oh, what are you doing? Oh, freshen up.'”

But there’s more to the story, and Cavallari isn’t afraid to pull it out of him. Jowsey, 27, is in a period of transformation, sparked by recent time with his family. “I think because I spent so much time with my family, I’m like, ‘Oh, I should probably be serious about our relationship now,'” he explains. “My mom was like, ‘I really want a grandkid.’ And my dad passed and he was like, ‘You’d be a great father. You need to have a kid.'”

This led to some serious self-reflection. “I was looking at myself and I’m like, ‘Whoa. Am I really presenting myself as someone that is a good boyfriend or a good husband?'” he says. “So it made me really put myself in a potential partner’s shoes and go, ‘What is good about this guy and what is bad about this guy?’ And do I see him being a father?”

Cavallari presses him further: “What does a successful relationship mean to you?” Jowsey stalls a bit before landing on an answer. “I think the biggest [thing] is I want someone that’s so passionate about their career and like what they’re doing and someone that has their own life,” he says. “Life’s pretty good when you’re just taking like selfies and like doing brand deals… I just realized that it doesn’t like stimulate me mentally.”

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Cavallari of course offers up her own advice, having been in Jowsey’s shoes before. “I think everyone goes through this phase where you have your friends in your 20s and then you kind of start growing up,” she says. “It sounds like you’re in this like transitional phase where unfortunately you do have to shed some people and then new people, good people, will come in.”

But don’t worry, he hasn’t completely reformed. He still sends questionable DMs (including one to Sabrina Carpenter: “Hey, like, you want another accent?”). And he just got a puppy, which he freely admits is part dating strategy. When showing his friend how to use dog photos as an opener, he explains his technique: “I was like, ‘Watch me work. Like, I’m gonna show you how to do it.'”

His new dating philosophy includes an elaborate multiple-choice system for date ideas, ranging from “pottery class, salsa class, go out for dinner, make dinner, Sakona National Park, beehive experience, mystery destination, snowboarding weekend, or St. Lucia.” It’s quite the evolution from someone who made his name on reality dating shows. “I don’t hate the multiple choice because it really tells me you put a lot of thought into it,” says Cavallari.

For now, though, he’s focused on personal growth. “I really need to do the groundwork to get myself more presentable, more attractive, and more like, I guess, locked in on who I want to become,” he says. And if you’re wondering whether the celibacy thing is permanent, well, as he puts it: “I’m not celibate because I wanna be.” Some things never change—and maybe that’s not such a bad thing.

Here’s what else we learned on this episode of Let’s Be Honest:

• Jowsey’s been listening to audiobooks, lots of them, at 2x speed: “I don’t know what he’s saying, but I’m like, this is good shit.”
• His AI assistant on IG sometimes beats him to DMs, causing “some really unfortunate misunderstandings.”
• Jowsey shows Cavallari the art of the unsend feature on IG (because it’s not as straightforward as it seems) and honestly, it’s good advice from someone who really knows.
• Cavallari exposes her dating red flags and advice for men: “We cannot be asking girls out from a place of ‘wounded feminine energy’.”