Whitney Port Shares the Emotional Strategy That Saved Her Motherhood Journey

For Whitney Port—mom, influencer, entrepreneur, and reality TV alum—one of the most valuable lessons about motherhood has been radical acceptance. Her journey to growing her family has included unexpected challenges. 

During her pregnancy with her son, Port experienced months of illness and developed red broken blood vessels across her chest that persisted her entire pregnancy. Stressed out, she asked her doctors to laser them off, but they encouraged her to wait. Remarkably, the day she gave birth, the blood vessels went away.

“Someone taught me that phrase [radical acceptance] like five years ago,” Port explains. “There’s no other option or else you’ll be miserable. This is such a natural thing that’s happening to your body.”

Although the story so far has been beautiful—Port is now mom to seven-year-old Sonny—her path hasn’t been linear. Port openly shares her experiences with infertility, IVF, and her latest decision to pursue surrogacy for her next child.

If you’re curious about pregnancy, postpartum, and motherhood, No Guide For This is the place for you. The new show explores adulting with or without kids—and helps you understand the potential emotional and physical hurdles of pregnancy and beyond.

On their show, hosts Jen Hayes Lee and Sasha Nichole Smith talk with Port about her motherhood journey and the lessons she’s learned—particularly about radical acceptance.  If you’re navigating fertility issues or curious about surrogacy, listen to first-hand advice from a mom who has been there, too.

Whitney Port Shares the Emotional Strategy That Saved Her Motherhood Journey

Assumptions and expectations of motherhood

As one of five siblings, Port says that her mom always made everything seem effortless. But she looks back retroactively and recalls her mother’s advantage—live-in support from her grandparents: “I had no idea what motherhood was. My mom never complained, and I always had the attitude like, ‘Okay, it will be easy.’ I’m very much an ignorance-is-bliss type of girl.” 

Port became pregnant at 32, making her one of the first of her friends to become a mom. “My friends told me it felt like a ‘child bride,’ at the time,” Port laughs. This idea of women having children later is refreshing as women focus more on themselves and what they want, she adds.

From pregnancy to fertility struggles

Port met her husband, Tim Rosenman, while filming The Hills, where he worked as a producer. It was love at first sight, she says. They started dating after the show ended, spent two years as a couple, another two engaged, and then got married.

A year into marriage, Port gave birth to Sonny in July 2017. It was only when trying to conceive again that she faced fertility challenges. After six miscarriages and trying to conceive for a long time, her health deteriorated. Port learned from her doctors that she has chromosomal issues. Following two physically and emotionally taxing rounds of IVF, and after trying every possible option, Rosenman suggested surrogacy. 

Surrogacy has been a huge relief for Port: “I feel very privileged that I am able to do surrogacy. I got sent a profile last week about a possible surrogate. We are interviewing people at the moment,” she says, ” “but if none of these embryos work, I’m just going to be at peace with it.”

Port acknowledges the complex emotions of having fertility issues after conceiving one child naturally. “But I want the life I envisioned, and I’m allowed that. It took me a while to get to this point where I will be okay no matter what. I’m so grateful for where I’m at,” she says.

Sharing authentic motherhood experiences

After her first pregnancy with her son, Port started experiencing debilitating nausea for 18 weeks. “I can’t be the only one who feels this way,” she thought. Her husband, Tim, encouraged her to begin documenting her experience to help other women. That was the beginning of  the I Love My Baby, But… series on YouTube.

“I remember I was in like my crusty robe, eating yogurt in my bed, like a glass of half drank, chocolate milk—so gross. I just couldn’t get out of bed,” Port says. “So I started talking about how I was really doing. I finally decided to put it out there, and I was so scared that everybody was going to think that I was a monster. But it turned out that it was like the beginning of those conversations that gave people a breath of fresh air that they could gasp in.”

Advice for navigating infertility and IVF

The hormones, the required medications, and your health and wellness—there is so much women have to consider when trying to get pregnant. It’s a challenging balancing act, made more difficult by the impact of stress on the body.

Regarding IVF, Port advises taking it step by step. “All you can do is stay in this moment, and when your mind starts to spiral, remember to focus on the task at hand. When you have to cross that bridge, you will have the tools to get there. But you are not there yet,” she says.

Port encourages that it is important to think about your future self. “Think about if and when it gets to a point where you can’t get pregnant, work on becoming at peace with that. Tune into gratitude for what you have—as cheesy as it sounds.”