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Girl, we’ll tell you for free: relationships are like roller coasters. On one hand, finding that person who gets you, makes your heart smile, brightens your mornings, and just gives you all the butterflies is the BEST frigging feeling ever. But on the other hand, figuring out the relationship itself is no walk in the park!  

Some guys bring out your best qualities and allow you to shine as the strong, independent queen you are . . . while others can honestly make you feel like the best part of you walked straight out the door. 

But, we’ve all been stuck in a relationship (or situationship) for WAY too long, even when the signs are there that it’s no longer fulfilling our needs. You feel insecure and unheard, and it’s like your soul is slowly shrinking like a withered flower with each red flag swept under the rug. Between late-night tears and overthinking, you lose your self-esteem and overall glow before you know it. 

We’re not going to sugarcoat it—feeling constantly unheard, disrespected, or unsafe in your own romance will drain you and make you feel incomplete. No one deserves that!

But, how do you know it’s time to fix things and when it’s time to walk away? Well, as your trusty guru in all things dating and self-care, we at Dear Media are bringing you the signs that you should GTFO out of your relationship. (If you’d rather hit fast-forward and listen to a podcast about this, jump into the episode of Being Her called 10 Red Flags I Would Not Put Up With in A Man & Nor Should You.

When To Walk Away From a Relationship That’s Not Serving You Anymore

How To Know When To Walk Away From a Relationship

Why is it Hard to Leave a Toxic Relationship?

Sending hugs and kisses to all of you who may be in a toxic relationship right now and feeling stuck. We understand that feeling of knowing you need to leave but still clinging to it like your fave discontinued tube of lip-gloss. So, why is it so hard to leave even when you know you deserve better?

One reason could be that you’re scared of the unknown. We know we’re speaking for most women when we say that leaving a relationship and stepping into the dating pool again is scary AF! So, we sometimes feel it’s best to tug out our current one, no matter how unhealthy. 

Another common reason is what we call the One more chance times a million syndrome. This is where we think our S.O. is irreplaceable and “the only one” for us. We hold on to the hope that things will change, so we keep giving chances to someone who repeatedly proves they can’t step up. It’s a cycle that can be difficult to break. 

Past trauma can also prevent you from leaving a toxic situation. If unhealthy relationships have been all you’ve known, it can feel impossible to break the cycle. If this sounds like you, learn What A Healthy Relationship Looks Like from the We Met at Acme podcast. And, while you’re at it, jump into Is Your Relationship Over? also by We Met at Acme!

Additionally, toxic relationships have a way of chipping away at your self-worth over time until you don’t feel deserving of the love and respect you crave. This makes it hard to leave. 

But, the good news is that you have the power to leave these unhealthy situations. Once you recognize any of these traits below, take it as a sign that it’s time to bounce. 

Emotional/Physical Abuse

Emotional or physical abuse should be an instant deal breaker in any partnership. No one has the right to lay a hand on you or constantly chip away at your self-esteem. If you’ve been experiencing frightening manipulation tactics, disrespectful behavior, or even physical abuse, please know that it’s never your fault. You don’t have to tolerate it!

Being with someone who exhibits signs of a narcissist, like gaslighting, stonewalling during arguments, or never accepting responsibility will leave you feeling on edge and walking on eggshells. And, leaving might even be harder when you’ve been made to feel like nothing without a man’s approval. But, you can walk away from him and survive it. If you need some encouragement, listen to this episode of Let’s Be Honest called Surviving Narcissist Abuse.

Lack of Trust

Trust takes time to build in any new relationship. But, a complete lack of it is definitely a sign that it may be time to let that loser go. A healthy partnership is built on honest, transparent communication where you both make each other feel secure. If you’re getting trickle-truths and inconsistencies in their stories, start feeling like you constantly have to check their location, question who they’re talking to, or find evidence they aren’t being loyal? Girl, take the next train out of that station. 


No relationship is perfect. But basic respect should be the bare minimum. And, anyone who can’t give that to you simply doesn’t deserve your time or energy. Period!

Any man who thinks it’s okay to blatantly disrespect you is a walking red flag and isn’t the one. For more on this, dive into this Twenty Whatever episode titled Red Flags in Relationships & Finding “The One.”

If your man constantly rolls his eyes when you share your dreams, talks over you in conversations, blows off plans to hang with the guys instead, or generally acts like your feelings don’t matter, ditch his disrespectful behind! 

How to Know When To Walk Away From a Relationship That’s Not Serving You Anymore


If you’ve caught your man cheating red-handed or you have enough evidence of his cheating, but he denies it or doesn’t seem to regret it, leave. This should be a clear sign that it’s time to cut ties. Even delete his number and treat yourself to something that actually keeps its promises…like a slice of chocolate cake or a new beginning hoodie!

The fact that he isn’t remorseful is a clear sign that he’ll do it again. After all, once a cheater, always a cheater—even though it doesn’t apply to everyone. Your mental health doesn’t need the emotional rollercoaster that will come with that.

Not to talk of the heartbreak from the actual cheating itself. But, you can help your healing process by listening to Cheating, Infidelity, & How To Move Forward After A Bad Break Up from the Him & Her podcast. 

Unmet Needs

We all love to get that butterflies feeling. But, what starts as head over heels can quickly fade when your needs aren’t being met as before. And, it’s normal for different love languages to lack occasionally, especially when you’re out of the honeymoon phase. But, when your partner consistently falls short, it shows they couldn’t be bothered about your well-being.

You shouldn’t have to beg for basic TLC, attention, respect, or affection before you get it. Plus, no one wants to constantly sacrifice their own joy and confidence to keep the peace. So, it may be time to say, “Boy, bye!”

Emotional Unavailability

Can we address the elephant in every exhausted girl’s room? Emotionally unavailable men. OMG! These types of men can be exhausting with their super dry texts, avoiding deep talks, and never compromising or apologizing. 

No matter how you try to sugarcoat or tolerate it, you’d eventually get tired of getting scraps of attention only when it suits him. So, you need to walk away. If you need help moving on, listen to this episode of Pretty Basic titled Situationships 101: Dating The Emotionally Unavailable + How To Move On.

However, aside from the fact that some men are simply incapable of forming deep connections, your man might be emotionally unavailable because he is either channeling his affection to another woman or has mentally checked out of the relationship.

If it’s the former, and he isn’t open to learning or getting help, it’s probably time to walk. You don’t need to burn yourself out trying to force intimacy that isn’t there.

Lack of Clarity About the Future

As women who are focused on becoming boss babes, we don’t have time for men who don’t see or want a future with us. If you’re constantly guessing where you stand or what the future holds with your man because he won’t define the relationship or open up about his long-term goals, it may be a sign that it’s not meant to last.

A healthy relationship thrives on transparency. You have every right to demand this, and you should never feel like a practice round he may trade in for a better option down the line. You deserve the security of knowing your man fully chose you and has plans for a future with you. 

Can a Toxic Relationship Be Fixed?

Can a Toxic Relationship Be Fixed?

When a relationship becomes toxic, it’s a sign that it has run its natural course and isn’t meant to last long term. But, yours can still work if you and your partner are fully willing. If you’re both ready to do some serious self-work, unlearn and relearn, or even go to therapy, there’s a slim chance you both might work out. 

However, if your efforts to change an unhealthy situation have already proven futile, it may be time to draw the line. Choose your peace and happiness over a relationship that’s no longer serving you! You can pick up a few tips on this from this episode of Him & Her titled How To Set Boundaries & Find Peace, A Guide To Reclaiming Yourself. Sometimes, the healthiest fix is to say au revoir!

No relationship is worth losing your glow over!

Relationships are a two-way street. So, the minute you feel like you’re the only one still invested, it’s time to say goodbye. Don’t ever feel ashamed or guilty about walking away from anything that doesn’t make you feel like the badass queen you are. You deserve a man who sees your worth and chooses to build a strong relationship with you. For the best help in this department, listen to this episode of Uncut and Uncensored called The Relationship Break Up Guide and this episode of We Met at Acme called How To Be Confident Breaking Up Was the Right Decision.

Regardless, we’re so proud of you for having the courage to acknowledge and walk away from that relationship that isn’t serving you anymore. So, if you need some motivation or encouragement on your self-care journey, check out Dear Media’s blog or podcasts for more uplifting stories of women who choose themselves.