There is a lot a girl looks for in a guy—and with good reason. No one should settle for anything less than the relationship they’ve dreamed of. (More on manifesting the love you desire here.) One of the main things we all look for in a man is ambition!
He doesn’t need to be a multi-millionaire. And, no. He doesn’t need to have his own business with the AMEX Platinum card. All we need is a man with the drive to accomplish his goals. There is something about that that just gets our heart pumping, but what is it???
Here’s why women like ambitious men:
Why Girls Like Guys With Ambition
Women want security.
First of all, women and men want different things out of their SO. As Lindsey Metselaar of We Met at Acme puts it: men want sex, and women want security. Yep, sounds right!
As women, we desire stability and reliability in a relationship. When you know your man is focused, committed, and driven to be better, you’ll feel safe when you’re around him. You know he’s always going to come through!
Plus, having a few extra zeroes in the bank account doesn’t hurt when it comes to security…right, ladies?
It shows serious commitment.
When your man is ambitious, and super motivated to accomplish his goal, honey, you know that man is loyal AF. If he can grind it out while starting a new business or advancing his career, you know he’s not going to give up when the going gets tough.
Just like he shows up at work, he’s going to show up with his relationships. He’s going to pursue you with the same focus he has on his dreams! No wandering eyes with an ambitious man. (Usually. If not, listen to the episode of We Met at Acme called How to Get a Man to Stay Loyal.)
No one needs to take care of them.
Who hates a man-child??? Literally all of us. So many men out there are just looking for someone who can take care of them like their mother did. HELLO, huge red flag. (Full list of dating red flags here—also adorbs red flag bucket hat here.)
Codependency doesn’t look good on anybody, especially on a guy you’re interested in. So, women like ambitious men, because it clearly shows they can handle their own and take care of themselves. These men are fiercely independent!
Women don’t want to settle.
It’s true that men settle more than women, however, it’s one of the 7 major reasons relationships fail according to Lauryn and Michael Bosstick of the Him & Her Podcast. So, women will often settle for nothing less than their Prince Charming (or, you know, their Derek Shepherd.)
This is another reason women go for men who are ambitious because when a man has drive, he has a lot of other important traits too like intentionality, financial stability, loyalty, intelligence, and so much more. He’s, like, the whole frickin’ package.
They match the energy of a boss bitch.
Keeping up with a badass woman who’s focused on her career or rocking that entrepreneur life isn’t for the meek. (More on the boss bitch persona in this episode of Him & Her.) The best man for the job is definitely going to be someone who is similarly driven. They’ll match the woman’s energy and they’ll challenge and better each other in the process.
When you’re both ambitious and motivated, no one is sitting on the couch every day, not applying themselves, and binging reruns of Laguna Beach. (Okay, but no Laguna Beach hate, we all love Back to the Beach.) Seriously, though, equal effort is a huge part of why boss bitches love ambitious men.
Women like men who are growing with them.
As we age, we grow. Most women are looking for long-term relationships and when you’re with someone for a long time, the expectation is that you both grow and change. However, we’ve all had bad relationships where the guy just would not grow up.
An ambitious man is always bettering themselves. If you and your partner can grow together, you’ll stay together. Wanna know how to be a better partner? Work on yourself, right?! Once you find that perfect man who’s going to want to embrace change with you, use our list of best podcasts for couples to listen in and challenge each other!
Women like men who are ambitious, because they check all the boxes!
Ambitious men are super f*cking attractive. We’re not talking about appearance. We’re talking about that whole package on the personality front! However, beware . . . some really ambitious men are also narcissists. Read this post on how to spot a narcissist, so you’re not distracted from red flags by your new man’s success or drive!
If you want more relationship wisdom, definitely head over to the Dear Media blog! There, you’ll also find your new fave merch store with products like this Who Cares What He Looks Like crewneck. Wear this on the first date to show him your priorities. (Actually, probably don’t do that.)