Man and woman in their undergarments lying together in a bed

Most of the time when we hear about sexual rejection, it’s men that are being rejected. But the reality is that women can be, and are, rejected sexually, too. Being out of sync with your partner can take a HUGE toll on your feelings and relationship, both in the short term and long term.

But here’s the thing—although both men and women experience rejection, how it affects each of them is vastly different. So, hang on tight, because we’re dedicating this post to a discussion about how a woman feels when she’s sexually rejected by her partner.

How Does A Woman Feel When Rejected Sexually?

How Does A Woman Feel When Rejected Sexually?

Let’s be honest, getting rejected sucks. Whether you’re asking for someone’s number or hoping for a moment of physical intimacy with your spouse, no one actually likes being told no. We kinda hate it, actually, even in situations where we know it’s probably for the best. (Shout out to our Have a Good Cry Mug that’s seen some uuuugly tears!)

So, as you might imagine, when a woman is rejected physically, it’s not a positive experience. In fact, a woman’s response to sexual rejection can be similar to physical pain. It can also lead to feelings of guilt, anger, frustration, embarrassment, confusion, and more. So. Much. More.

How Does a Sexually Rejected Woman Behave?

How Does a Sexually Rejected Woman Behave?

Being sexually rejected can be particularly difficult for a female partner in a relationship because women often associate sex with love, self-worth, body image, emotional connection, and relationship expectations. 

Feeling rejected sexually can take a toll on a woman’s confidence. With a lack of insight into the male perspective, a rejected woman can start to question other aspects of her relationship. Overwhelmed by feelings of insecurity, she will start to lack confidence not only in herself but also in her partner. 

Rejection can make a woman feel inadequate, unloved, and undesired, leading to further problems within her relationship. She might also become easily frustrated and angry. You may not think sex matters that much to women, but it does!

 

What To Do When Your Partner Rejects You Sexually

Before we dive in, we want to clarify that in this post, we’re talking about sexual rejection within an otherwise healthy dynamic. If your partnership, relationship, or marriage is affected by serious issues, like abuse, trauma, or addiction, you should get help from a professional. These tips are meant for women who are feeling sexually rejected by their partner, who is overall a good human being, to help them overcome this obstacle in their healthy relationship.

Not sure if your relationship is healthy? These posts might help:

Shower yourself with self-love.

When your self-confidence takes a hit, give it a boost with some self-care. We’re a tad self-care obsessed (self-care podcasts, anyone?), but only because we’ve witnessed firsthand the power it has to soothe whatever hurts your body and soul. 

Taking care of yourself can make it easier to manage your feelings in an appropriate way. Knowing that your own needs are being met can also help you focus on your relationship and what you can do for your partner.

For more info on building your self-worth after rejection, check out the episode of Life with Marianna called Build Your Self-Worth, Redefine Rejection, and Overcome Imposter Syndrome.

Try to silence your assumptions.

Too often, we are our own worst enemy. The things you think are true, might not be. Women are sometimes quick to assume that when their partner isn’t interested in sex, it’s a sign of a much bigger problem. When your partner says no to sex, you might take it to mean that they’re not attracted to you or no longer love you. In reality, they could be dealing with personal issues that simply make it difficult to get in the mood. Like, they could literally just be tired! 

Talk to your partner.

Communication is crucial in a healthy relationship. The best way to overcome any obstacle, including feeling rejected sexually, is to talk about it with your partner. Avoid accusations and derogatory comments that can further derail things. Instead, approach the conversation genuinely, with affection and understanding. 

Explain how you feel and then encourage your partner to open up about things that might be hindering their interest in sex. Are there aspects of your relationship outside of sex that are bothering them? Do they need something different to help them feel close to you or get in the mood? Remember, don’t judge them. Try to see things from their perspective. You might be able to get to the root of the problem and overcome it by working together.

For more expert tips on how to change the dynamic of your relationship, check out the episode of Being Her called He Doesn’t Want to Have Sex Anymore! Steps to Changing the Dynamic.

Evaluate your approach.

Many women don’t put a lot of thought into how to ask for sex from their partner. They might assume it’s an automatic yes, not realizing that their approach can make or break the moment. Obviously, this isn’t the case for everyone dealing with sexual rejection, but for some women, it can be a sign that you need to try something different to initiate intimacy. In the face of rejection, embrace reinvention! 

Listen to this episode of Ex-Virgin for some fantastic tips on how to get what you want from your partner in the bedroom, straight from Westin Mitchell, founder of Woo More Play.

what to do when your partner rejects you sexually

Remember, if you’re feeling sexually rejected, that doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you! 

Sexually rejected men tend to get more attention than females in the same boat. That alone can make your experience harder to deal with. But you’re not alone. And we hope that with this post, you feel empowered to face your feelings and take steps to resolve them. 

For more posts like this one, head over to the blog. And, if you need a whole playlist of podcast episodes to get you through this, we got you! Here are some to help you when dealing with sexual rejection: