Everyone’s talking about self care these days. But when you really think about it, what exactly is self care? Is it just taking care of yourself? Or is it something deeper? Self-care has become a sort-of buzz word lately, and it can take many forms… It can be mental, physical, emotional, or spiritual. It can be routine or something you do occasionally. Really, it can be anything that you do for yourself that impacts your attitude, mental health, or life in a positive way. It’s about finding balance in a world where we are constantly overstimulated and inundated with information. It’s no wonder we feel overwhelmed all of the time! For a more detailed explanation of self care, check out The Papaya Podcast: The One Where We Get Curious About Self Care with Johnathan Van Ness.

As with any mainstream or popular trend, there are tons of myths out there about self care that can make it hard to focus on what really matters…you! But, don’t worry – we’re here to set the record straight! Self care is absolutely necessary for an overall happy and healthy life. So believing myths about self care can cause way more harm than good. So, let’s talk about the common myths surrounding self care and why you should stop believing them ASAP!

7 Self Care Myths

Self Care is Optional

Here at Dear Media, we think one of the biggest myths about self care is that it is optional. Self care is absolutely essential to a happy and healthy life, which means it is not an option to practice self care…it’s a necessity. There is much to be learned from Being Bumo: Let’s Talk about Self-Care with Alex Taylor, but the most important thing we can take away from this podcast is that you must take time for yourself. Take steps to ensure that your mind, body, and spirit are fulfilled and nurtured. It is only when we take proper care of ourselves that we can truly begin to care for others.

Self Care is Selfish

So much of what we do each and every day revolves around the people in our lives. We take care of our families, we show up to work, we listen to our friends, and so on. And then, when we finally take time for ourselves, we feel selfish for putting everyone else on the back burner. THIS IS A MYTH WE MUST DEBUNK RIGHT NOW!

Self care is not selfish. You can’t expect to be at the top of your game if you aren’t spending time taking care of yourself! In order to be there for the people around you and handle all of the things the world throws at you, you have to practice self care. And when your self care needs are finally met, you can give more positive energy to the people around you. Wondering how to start your self care regimen? We’ve got you covered. Get the Fuck Out Of The Sun: Kristin Cavallari – Personal Skincare & Health Routine, Facialist Secrets, & Evolving Your Self Care is all about how to take better care of yourself and can help you begin an awesome self care routine.

Self Care Takes Too Much Money or Effort

Self care does not have to be expensive and it does not have to require too much energy or effort. It’s about making yourself feel happy and healthy and there are plenty of budget friendly or even free ways to accomplish this. Lipstick on the Rim: A Model’s Guide to Beauty Secrets, Skincare Hacks, & Tips for Insane Confidence with the Self-Love Queens of Model Citizens is chock full of cheap and easy ways to take better care of yourself.

The ways to practice self care that won’t break the bank but will still provide actual benefits are endless. You can do a face mask, take a relaxing bubble bath, meditate, take a walk, get some fresh air, take a break from social media, go for a long run, and the list goes on and on. Don’t let this myth hold you back from showing up for yourself. Self care absolutely does not have to be hard or expensive to make a real difference in your life.

Self Care is Feminine

Let’s make this crystal clear. True self care is not bound by gender, sexuality, race, or anything. Everyone requires a certain level of self care to live a happy, healthy, and overall positive life. There is a common misconception that being sensitive, having good hygiene, and taking care of yourself is girly or feminine…and we’re here to tell you that this is straight up FALSE. Each and every person must have their self care needs met in order to improve their mental health and realize their full potential. Sit down with Jill Dunn, Carlene Higgins, and Whitney Port in Breaking Beauty: Whitney Port Opens Up About Self-Care, Her Exact Skincare Routine and Reality TV 2.0 to hear more about how self care looks different for everyone!

Self Care Must be Earned

Self care does not need to be earned! Many people think that doing something nice for yourself has to be a reward for accomplishing something else…and this is a complete and total myth. Self care isn’t a reward for accomplishing goals or having a good day – self care is essential to your health and happiness and thus, should be practiced no matter what!

For more on the myth of “earning” self care, check out The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Podcast: Self-Care 101 with Lauryn Evarts – Tips on Morning Routines, Self-Care, and Living Your Best Life to hear about how self care can help you live your best life, irregardless of failures/successes in other parts of your life. And also be sure to check out The Art of Being Well: Serena Poon: The Mindset of a Manifestor, Culinary Alchemy, Transcendental Meditation + Self-Trust as The New Self Care to hear about how self care requires self trust…trust that you deserve your self care and that it is essential to your health and happiness.

Self Care Is Doing Anything That Makes You Feel Good

There’s a big difference between doing something that feels good in the moment and doing something that will have a positive impact on your mental, emotional, or physical health long-term. Acts of self care shouldn’t include activities that are addictive, harmful, or compulsive, otherwise they’ll have the opposite effect. Choose self care activities that will make you feel good now AND later.

In this episode of Trying Not To Care, host Ashley Corbo gives some valuable insight into what self care can look like when you focus on truly taking care of yourself.

Self Care Is A Cure-All

Oh, how we wish it was, though. But really, this one’s important. Too many people assume that integrating self-care into their routine will magically erase whatever they’re dealing with. The reality is that self care is about nourishing your mind, body, and soul. It can certainly help you feel physically rejuvenated, more empowered, and less stressed, and in turn, make the load you’re carrying feel a little lighter.

Check out Balanced Black Girl: Why We Need Hobbies For Self-Care to learn more about how different types of self care can positively impact your overall wellbeing.

How To Have A Self Care Day

+ Take a long bubble bath

+ Turn your phone off and read a book

+ Catch up on your favorite podcasts

+ Go for a walk or hike

+ Binge your favorite feel-good TV show

+ Turn on some music and have a solo dance party

+ Pamper yourself with a facial, massage, mani/pedi, etc.

+ Take a nap

+ Have a cup of coffee or tea at your favorite coffee shop

+ Clean or organize your living space

+ Do your favorite kind of exercise

+ Write an old-fashioned letter to send to a friend or family member

Debunking All Those Self Care Myths

As you can see, self care is absolutely essential to our lives. Self care can make you feel good, improve your mental health, reduce stress, help you create better social relationships, and more! The most important thing to remember today is that you can not help and care for others properly until you’ve taken good care of yourself. Self care gives you the energy and motivation needed live your best life. So you can be the best version of yourself! When you’re ready to start your self care routine, feel free to come back to this article for awesome tips and podcast episodes that can provide guidance and advice on all things self care. And for more interesting blogs like How to Forgive Yourself or Stress Management Techniques at Home, be sure to check out the Dear Media Blog!

 

There are A TON of dating terms and slang words in the world of modern dating. It can be hard AF to keep up, but it’s important to understand what people are talking about. 

For example, have you noticed all of the recent chatter about flags? People everywhere are talking about red, yellow, green, and beige flags. But WTF does it all mean? 

Let’s get a few things straight. Red flags are the things that set off BIG alarm bells and almost guarantee this thing is NOT going to work. Yellow flags are things that may or may not be problematic. And, green flags? Those are the things that tell us our S.O. is a good pick!

But what about beige flags? We got you!! Today, we’re sharing all the deets on beige flags. Let’s get into it:

Beige Flag Meaning

We’ve all experienced our fair share of red and green flags in our dating lives. But beige flags? Now that’s a new one. It all started on social media in 2022 when a TikTok user, @itscaito, came across some seriously boring dating profiles. According to her, people with stuff on their profiles like cliche profile pictures holding fish or bios that read “My hobbies are drinking coffee and walking my dog” scream boring and basic. Hence, they are “dull as beige.” (Here’s more on why a dating app profile may totally suck.)

Is drinking coffee and loving your furry friend bad? Is fishing always a turn off? No way! But, they’re regular every-day things that don’t pique our interest on dating profiles. This #boring vibe was the original meaning of “beige flag,” but over time, other TikTok users started sharing hilarious stories about their partners’ little quirks and idiosyncrasies, so the definition evolved.

Now, rather than meaning boring or basic, beige flags are simply things people do that make you pause, like, “Who does that?” These traits aren’t necessarily good nor bad they’re just different. They’re behaviors that are totally quirky but never an actual dealbreaker. 

Beige flags are now subjective to each person. Because what might be a beige flag for you might be a green flag for another, or it might even be a red flag for some. It just depends on your taste or perspective. (Think, pineapple on pizza.) We’ll get into some beige flags below! 

What Is A Beige Flag?

A beige flag in a relationship is a characteristic or habit you notice in a person that isn’t necessarily good or bad, just quirky or odd. It could shine a light on your partner’s endearing oddity. Or, it could be the thing that totally gives you the ick no matter how insignificant it seems. It totally depends on you and your pet peeves.  

Unlike red flags, these things are subjective and not dealbreakers unless you want them to be. Basically, you’re the judge. Either way . . . that beige flag will probably always bug you a little bit. If it bothers you A LOT it could be a warning sign that you’re dating the wrong person. 

It’s not that they’re a crappy person or even a bad boyfriend/girlfriend. The beige flag just means they may or may not be right for you. Here are some of the most common beige flags our Dear Media podcast hosts talk about:

30 Beige Flag Examples

1. Makes weird moaning sounds while they eat. 
2. Infinitely reuses the same issue, stuffing it in their pocket each time.
3. Never puts lids back on stuff. 
4. Set a dozen alarms and ignore them all. 
5. Texts by sending a million short individual texts instead of typing it all out before sending. 
6. Wearing clothes that are all too big or too small. 
7. Has a repeated “catch phrase” that you can’t unhear once you notice it. 
8. Packs literally last minute for any trap. 
9. Always complaining about some ailment like a headache, tickling in their throat, being tired, etc. 
10. Never asks follow-up questions when they hear hot goss.
11. Walks too fast or too slow. 
12. Irrationally afraid of the dark, bugs, or other childish fears. 
13. Holes in all socks and underwear. 
14. Still takes mirror selfies like it’s 2007. 
15. Wears a toe ring. 
16. Reads ebooks. 
17. Apologies too much over everything. 
18. Unnecessarily competitive over things that don’t matter. 
19. Overshares ALL the time totally unprompted. 
20. Bites utensils and straws. 
21. Eats leftovers cold out of the fridge. 
22. Rearranges furniture constantly. 
23. Has a business degree. 
24. Takes too many baths as an adult. 
25. Falls asleep every time you watch anything. 
26. Gives random items pronouns. (Like their car.)
27. Never finish the last bit of their drinks or meals. 
28. They’ll post you on their Insta story but not their grid.
29. Can’t tell left from right without using their hands. 
30. Drinks from multiple beverages at the same time.  

There are a lot more where that came from! If you want to hear even more on this, listen to this episode of What We Said where besties Jaci and Chelsey give you the DL On their beige flag experiences! 

Don’t be too quick to judge; beige might be your color.

Can beige flags be breakup worthy??? Sure, it could mean it’s time to put on your red flag bucket hat and walk away, but we want to challenge you guys! Beige flags remind us that love is not about finding the perfect person but finding beauty in their imperfections (sounds very clichè, but it’s true). Even though these traits can get annoying at some point, you can simply talk it out with your partner casually. A simple, lighthearted conversation about his quirks, without hurting his feelings, could be a healthy way to strengthen your relationship. 

Rather than judging your partner’s odd behaviors, see their beige flags as opportunities to bond and laugh over what shapes your better half into Mr. Right. Very often, it’s the tiny differences that make a relationship feel like you’ve found the yin to your yang, the Pam to your Jim. 

When you think you’ve found that imperfect, perfect person, listen to the Him & Her podcast to learn how to keep that love and live happily. If you need more helpful relationship advice, you can always find us on our Dear Media blog or listen to our podcasts, where we discuss everything life and love.

When you’re running a podcast, one of the ultimate goals is to monetize your content. Why??? Because that’s when you can take your podcast from a hobby to an actual career! Once you have a decent fan base going, a great way to monetize is via affiliate marketing and selling merch. (Need inspo on merch? Check out our Dear Media Shop!)

Selling products or sharing affiliate links is great in theory . . . but how do you share it with your fanbase? Social media, particularly TikTok, is one of the best ways to advertise your fave products to your audience! Your posted podcast clips and other TikTok videos will draw in your fans (and future fans) and guide them to your TikTok shop!

Since launching TikTok Shop in September 2023, TikTok has been recognized as one of the best e-commerce platforms for both buyers and sellers. If you want to take advantage of the lucrative opportunities TikTok has to offer, finding trending products on the app is a great place to start. That way you know exactly what to show and sell to your audience! You’ll quickly notice that while these products might be sold by a lot of other sellers, they get a ton of attention from potential buyers. 

So, today we’re sharing a guide on how to find trending products on TikTok in real time.

How To Find Trending Products On TikTok

Step 1: Determine your niche.

Before you begin selling products on TikTok, you should have a general idea of what kinds of products you want to sell. Think about what your audience wants and what matches your podcast vibe. Products that fit your category will definitely generate the most hype!

To hear how a couple of super successful found their niche, listen to Tinx chat about TikTok and finding your niche on this episode of Life With Marianna, then check out this episode of Let’s Get Dressed, in which host Olivia Perez sits down with Coco Mocoe, the queen of predicting TikTok trends, to discuss how Coco found her niche.

Step 2: Spend time on TikTok.

This one’s easy, but it’s arguably the most important. To find trending products on TikTok, you should spend time on the app. Browse the shop tab and scroll through the videos. Take note of any videos related to products and the kinds of attention it’s getting.

Wanna know what makes TikTok tik? Don’t miss this episode of Who’s On Content?. EJ sits down with TikTok Director of Creator Community Kudzi Chikumbu as he explains “How Lowering The Barrier of Creation, Everyone Is Now on Content at TikTok.”

Step 3: Follow popular TikTok influencers.

Another great way to find trending products on TikTok is to follow some of the top US TikTok influencers. These creators and influencers, with hundreds of thousands and even millions of followers, often share trending products in their videos (as well as some game-changing TikTok hacks). By doing this, you can learn more about how some of these big names use TikTok to share personal stories, grow their brand, and make money. 

Step 4: Take advantage of personalized content recommendations.

Want to know one of the secrets of TikTok? The app’s unique algorithm chooses what content to share with you based on your preferences. So, if you engage with content that’s related to your brand or online business, the algorithm will show you more content, and therefore more products, within your niche. Use the algorithm to your advantage by being intentional about the content you interact with. This way, you’re more likely to find trending products to sell without having to work so hard.

Step 5: Find trending hashtags and keywords with TikTok’s search feature.

You can learn SO MUCH by paying attention to trending hashtags and keywords. TBH, we love using them to keep up with the latest pop culture news, but they’re also super helpful for finding products to sell on TikTok. To be successful (and rock this Successful Era Tee with pride), use trending hashtags and keywords to point you in the right direction.

Step 6: Use TikTok business tools.

If you don’t have a business account yet, GET ONE! A TikTok Business account gives you access to tools that provide valuable insight into which items are the most popular, AKA which ones are more lucrative. Use these tools to monitor data and trends, and soon enough you’ll rake in enough dough to fill this cute Breadwinning Housewife Tote.

For more, get advice and inspiration from our favorite podcast interviews! Check out this episode of Not Skinny But Not Fat where host Amanda Hirsch sits down with TikTok influencer Addison Rae, this interview with style influencer and TikTok star Brittany Xavier on Let’s Get Dressed, and this episode of Career Contessa, where Corporate Natalie discusses TikTok fame, growing a brand, and the myth about influencers. SUCH GOOD STUFF! 

Marketing affiliate products and selling merch on TikTok can help you monetize your podcast!

Knowing what products are trending on a huge e-commerce platform like TikTok makes it easier to know what your target audience is interested in buying. Keeping a constant eye on trending hashtags and endorsements from popular influencers also helps you to stay ahead of your competition. Although spending time on TikTok feels less like work and more like play, when used strategically, it can set you up for success. So, keep on scrolling! 

For more tips, tricks, and tools for success, head over to the Dear Media blog. Also, be sure to check out our show guide to discover the latest and greatest podcasts to binge. Remember, you can be scrolling on TikTok and brainstorming merch while you listen! It’s time to rethink this strategy, throw on your Rebranding tee, and let’s make this thing HUGE!

Mental toughness is talked about a lot in the sports world. But it has real-life applications that are WAY too substantial to ignore. In this crazy world we live in today, having mental toughness is sooo important. Research shows that mentally-tough people are better at stress management, self-regulation, and problem solving.

Whether you’re battling haters, struggling to stay motivated to work toward your goals, overcoming struggles like addiction, or simply learning how to forgive someone who hurt you, it can be hard to pick yourself up and keep moving forward! Having mental toughness or “grit” is essential to achieving goals and being successful in life.

Mental toughness isn’t just something you’re born with, it’s something you have to learn. And there’s no better way to learn something than by listening to relevant podcasts! Podcasts are motivating, inspiring, relatable, and interesting. And also a rich source of information, including tips on how to improve your mental health. In light of this, we’ve created a roundup of the ten best podcasts to improve your mental toughness!

The 10 Best Mental Toughness Podcasts

What You’re Craving: Breaking Down the Difference Between Mental Health and Mental Toughness 

Sit down with Molly Carmel and special guest, Victoria Garrick in this episode of What You’re Craving. Victoria is a mental health advocate, TED talk speaker, and podcast host of Real Pod. Molly and Victoria talk about sports psychology, overcoming eating disorders, and how to feel comfortable in your own body. This 45 minute episode is full of relatable stories and tips on how to conquer your challenges.

The Blonde Files Podcast: How to Master Your Mind with Dr. Caroline Leaf

The Blonde Files Podcast, hosted by Arielle Lorre, is a podcast dedicated to all things wellness, but it’s no ordinary wellness podcast. In each episode, Arielle sits down with experts and inspirational guests to chat about the latest and greatest ways to live your best life. In this episode, Arielle welcomes Dr. Caroline Leaf for a discussion about how we can rewire our brains to become more resilient and other practical tips for changing our thought patterns and gaining mental strength. This is one podcast episode you don’t want to miss!

House Guest With Kenzie Elizabeth: Dicked Down in Dallas, Mental Health, Addiction, Self Awareness, & Believing in Yourself with Trey Lewis

Meet country music star Trey Lewis in this down-to-earth episode of House Guest with Kenzie Elizabeth. Kenzie is an amazing podcast host who never holds back and loves to dive into deep and interesting topics. Her podcast is full of intriguing interviews with all types of professionals like musicians, artists, and change-makers. Kenzie and Trey talk about Trey’s new song, mental health, addiction, and how he became the person he is today.

Recovering From Reality: Teenage Depression and Behavior Modification Programs with Sadie Sutton

In this open and honest episode of Recovering From Reality, podcast host Alexis Haines sits down with Sadie Sutton. Sadie is a mental health advocate, college-student, and she has been through the ringer. Alexis and Sadie talk about Sadie’s battle with depression, teenage behavioral modification programs, masking your issues, self-harming as a call for attention, and residential treatment of depression. They also discuss Sadie’s life dream of becoming a psychologist. Plus, specifically how she plans to use her experiences and education to help others.

Barely Filtered: Olivia Culpo On Overcoming Dark Days, the Power of Prayer, and Finding True Love

Are you ready for this one? In one of the best episodes of Barely Filtered to date, host Aurora Culpo sits down with actress, model, activist, and former Miss Universe Olivia Culpo, who also just so happens to be her sister, for a candid and memorable conversation. Olivia shares advice on manifesting the life of your dreams, the power of prayer, and how the ups and downs have shaped her.

Real Pod: Remi Bader on Navigating The Thick of Her Eating Disorder + Discussing Your Mental Health with Parents

Get ready to dive into the deep, dark world of eating disorders in this episode of Real Pod. Victoria Garrick, podcast host, sits down with Remi Bader, Tiktok star and entrepreneur, to share their stories of struggle and recovery. Both Victoria and Remi have overcome eating disorders and their struggles have inspired them to share their stories with anyone who might be going through the same thing. In this episode, you’ll hear about different approaches to healing, how to open up to your support group, how and why to get out of your comfort zone, and how to better relate to the people around you.

The Papaya Podcast: The One About Rebooting Your Life With Sasha Exeter

The Papaya Podcast, hosted by Sarah Nicole, is one of the best podcasts for female entrepreneurs. In this episode, Sarah sits down with Sasha Exeter – mother, business-owner, and overall bad-ass. Sarah and Sasha talk about reaching for your dreams, overcoming challenges, Sasha’s accomplishments, and how Sasha was able to achieve so much while battling a chronic illness. If you’re looking for a feel-good, confidence building podcast, this is the one!

The Skinny Confidential: How To Rid Yourself of Things That Are Holding You Back So You Can Move Forward, Succeed, & Find Happiness

The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Podcast is hosted by our favorite couple, Lauryn and Michael Bosstick. Lauryn and Michael are sassy, hilarious, and they’re never afraid to go there. They are interesting and thought-provoking and hey don’t give a f*ck about being taboo. They’re ready to share all their best advice. In this episode, Lauryn and Michael talk about the things that tend to hold us back in life and how to kick those stressors to the curve. They also take some time to answer questions from fans about life, business, relationships, what’s trending, and more!

The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Podcast: Navy SEAL Clint Emerson On Resilience, Mental Toughness, Being Aware, Survival, & Life As A Soldier

Another must-listen from TSC Him & Her podcast, this episode includes valuable information on mental toughness straight from one of the best sources on the topic, Clint Emerson. Clint is a retired Navy SEAL, author, and founder of the crisis management company Escape the Wolf. In this episode, Lauryn and Michael discuss mental toughness, personal resilience, and why they’re important in your daily life.

With Whit: Best of WITH WHIT: Chats on Self-Help, Grief and Mental Health

With Whit is one of the best mental health podcasts around. Whitney Port is super kind and relatable and she strives to be as open with her audience as possible. In this episode, Whitney reveals that she has been going through a slump and shares the steps she took to get out of it. She talks about taking time to reflect and how important it is to take time for self care. This episode is made up of some of the best advice Whitney has given over the course of her podcast, all rolled into one all encompassing episode. If you’re ready for some awesome advice about all things mental health and self-care, you’ve found the right episode!

Tips on How to Improve Mental Toughness

+ Focus on the positive

+ Practice mindfulness

+ Maintain a growth mindset

+ Work with a professional (therapist,

+ Step out of your comfort zone

+ Lean on your support system

+ Practice self-compassion

How will you grow your mental toughness?

There you have it folks, these are our absolute favorite podcasts episodes that can help you grow your mental toughness. If there is one thing we know for sure, it’s that learning to stand up for yourself and taking control of your mind will help you survive this crazy thing we call life. At Dear Media, we have tons of amazing podcasts episodes about mental health, overcoming struggles, and more! So, feel free to peruse our website for more awesome content and podcast episodes. You can find all of the podcasts above on our website, Spotify, and Apple Podcasts and we wish you the best on your journey to find your best self!

Most of the time when we hear about sexual rejection, it’s men that are being rejected. But the reality is that women can be, and are, rejected sexually, too. Being out of sync with your partner can take a HUGE toll on your feelings and relationship, both in the short term and long term.

But here’s the thing—although both men and women experience rejection, how it affects each of them is vastly different. So, hang on tight, because we’re dedicating this post to a discussion about how a woman feels when she’s sexually rejected by her partner.

How Does A Woman Feel When Rejected Sexually?

Let’s be honest, getting rejected sucks. Whether you’re asking for someone’s number or hoping for a moment of physical intimacy with your spouse, no one actually likes being told no. We kinda hate it, actually, even in situations where we know it’s probably for the best. (Shout out to our Have a Good Cry Mug that’s seen some uuuugly tears!)

So, as you might imagine, when a woman is rejected physically, it’s not a positive experience. In fact, a woman’s response to sexual rejection can be similar to physical pain. It can also lead to feelings of guilt, anger, frustration, embarrassment, confusion, and more. So. Much. More.

How Does a Sexually Rejected Woman Behave?

Being sexually rejected can be particularly difficult for a female partner in a relationship because women often associate sex with love, self-worth, body image, emotional connection, and relationship expectations. 

Feeling rejected sexually can take a toll on a woman’s confidence. With a lack of insight into the male perspective, a rejected woman can start to question other aspects of her relationship. Overwhelmed by feelings of insecurity, she will start to lack confidence not only in herself but also in her partner. 

Rejection can make a woman feel inadequate, unloved, and undesired, leading to further problems within her relationship. She might also become easily frustrated and angry. You may not think sex matters that much to women, but it does!

 

What To Do When Your Partner Rejects You Sexually

Before we dive in, we want to clarify that in this post, we’re talking about sexual rejection within an otherwise healthy dynamic. If your partnership, relationship, or marriage is affected by serious issues, like abuse, trauma, or addiction, you should get help from a professional. These tips are meant for women who are feeling sexually rejected by their partner, who is overall a good human being, to help them overcome this obstacle in their healthy relationship.

Not sure if your relationship is healthy? These posts might help:

• Beware Of These Signs Of A Toxic Person
• How To Spot A Narcissist Early In A Relationship
• Things Your Partner Should Never Say To You
• Signs He’s Cheating On You

Shower yourself with self-love.

When your self-confidence takes a hit, give it a boost with some self-care. We’re a tad self-care obsessed (self-care podcasts, anyone?), but only because we’ve witnessed firsthand the power it has to soothe whatever hurts your body and soul. 

Taking care of yourself can make it easier to manage your feelings in an appropriate way. Knowing that your own needs are being met can also help you focus on your relationship and what you can do for your partner.

For more info on building your self-worth after rejection, check out the episode of Life with Marianna called Build Your Self-Worth, Redefine Rejection, and Overcome Imposter Syndrome.

Try to silence your assumptions.

Too often, we are our own worst enemy. The things you think are true, might not be. Women are sometimes quick to assume that when their partner isn’t interested in sex, it’s a sign of a much bigger problem. When your partner says no to sex, you might take it to mean that they’re not attracted to you or no longer love you. In reality, they could be dealing with personal issues that simply make it difficult to get in the mood. Like, they could literally just be tired! 

Talk to your partner.

Communication is crucial in a healthy relationship. The best way to overcome any obstacle, including feeling rejected sexually, is to talk about it with your partner. Avoid accusations and derogatory comments that can further derail things. Instead, approach the conversation genuinely, with affection and understanding. 

Explain how you feel and then encourage your partner to open up about things that might be hindering their interest in sex. Are there aspects of your relationship outside of sex that are bothering them? Do they need something different to help them feel close to you or get in the mood? Remember, don’t judge them. Try to see things from their perspective. You might be able to get to the root of the problem and overcome it by working together.

For more expert tips on how to change the dynamic of your relationship, check out the episode of Being Her called He Doesn’t Want to Have Sex Anymore! Steps to Changing the Dynamic.

Evaluate your approach.

Many women don’t put a lot of thought into how to ask for sex from their partner. They might assume it’s an automatic yes, not realizing that their approach can make or break the moment. Obviously, this isn’t the case for everyone dealing with sexual rejection, but for some women, it can be a sign that you need to try something different to initiate intimacy. In the face of rejection, embrace reinvention! 

Listen to this episode of Ex-Virgin for some fantastic tips on how to get what you want from your partner in the bedroom, straight from Westin Mitchell, founder of Woo More Play.

Remember, if you’re feeling sexually rejected, that doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you! 

Sexually rejected men tend to get more attention than females in the same boat. That alone can make your experience harder to deal with. But you’re not alone. And we hope that with this post, you feel empowered to face your feelings and take steps to resolve them. 

For more posts like this one, head over to the blog. And, if you need a whole playlist of podcast episodes to get you through this, we got you! Here are some to help you when dealing with sexual rejection:

• The Reason He’s Not Choosing You – Almost Adulting 
• Getting Closure and Being Rejected – Pretty Basic 
• The 13 Feminine Seduction Archetypes – Oddvice
• Exploring Your Sexuality in a Relationship – Oddvice 
• Rejection, Beauty Standards, & How to Feel Sexier – Real Pod

 

It’s hard enough to make friends as an adult these days, let alone if you throw a little social anxiety disorder into the mix. And girl, do we feel you—some days, it can feel downright impossible to make friends when you have social anxiety. Most of us go through it, so know you are not alone. In fact, it’s so common that 7.1% of the US population are people with social anxiety!

But, just because it feels like everyone else has their new BFFs on lock while you’re trying to get the courage to tell a waiter that your food is literally raw, doesn’t mean you can’t make real connections. Even super outgoing people can develop social anxiety after stressful life events, and that’s totally valid. Don’t believe us? Check out the episode of That’s the Point titled DO WE ALL HAVE SOCIAL ANXIETY?

However, while our minds might try to convince us that staying home is safer, we all need a community of people to support us. So, whether you mostly avoid social situations or just want one trusted homie, this girl gang’s got you. We’re spilling the tea on how to deal with social anxiety and expand your social circle and find your people—anxiety and all. 

You’ve got this, babe!

How To Make Friends With Social Anxiety

Understand the symptoms of social anxiety. 

Ever notice how your heart races, or you get sweaty palms at the thought of striking up a convo? Well, girl, those physical symptoms are common for those of us dealing with social anxiety. But, you know what helps change the chat? Knowledge!

Getting real with yourself about your symptoms not only helps you cope but also helps you find your people. Let’s break it down: social anxiety isn’t just being a little shy sometimes. Social anxiety is when negative thoughts like “they’re all judging me” or “I’ll say something dumb” start swirling in your mind before you even leave the house. Then, your heart starts racing and you get all fidgety.

However, understanding these anxiety symptoms is the first step to planning how to manage it instead of running from social interactions. Once you recognize that a symptom like sweaty palms is related to anxiety, you can plan accordingly—like carrying fidget toys or practicing calming breathing. Our girl Sarah Nicole discusses this in detail in the episode of The Papaya Podcast called The One About Untangling Our Anxiety.

The moral of the story? Own what’s happening in your nervous system so you can work with it instead of against it.

Replace negative thoughts with positive ones. 

We’ve all been in those situations where your brain goes on and on about what could go wrong in a social setting. “They’ll think I’m lame,” or “I’ll have nothing to say,”. So now, it’s time to rewire all those negative thoughts. Take a cue from the The Art of Being Well episode called The Science of Reducing Anxiety, Stress, + Toxic Thinking. 

When the anxieties start swirling, pause and challenge that mental mess. Train your brain to replace those unhelpful thoughts with compassion. Say to yourself, “I am interesting! I’ve got this!” or “Everyone gets nervous sometimes.” Because everyone does, in fact, get nervous sometimes. 

Take small steps. 

Any major change is intimidating. But big changes happen one teeny step at a time. And girl, that is perfectly okay. Sometimes, our courage comes in small doses, and that’s alright, too. Rather than stressing about going to large social settings to meet new people, you can try easing into it with low-key settings. 

Your favorite coffee shop can be the perfect place to start. Take note of some regulars and say hello with a smile. From there, you can start some small talk when next you see them. Small acts of putting yourself out there regularly can go a long way in building your confidence. For more help with this, listen to these confidence boosting podcasts! 

Don’t put pressure on yourself. 

We’re done pressuring ourselves. You know as well as we do that beating yourself up when anxiety ruins your plans only breeds more anxiety. Nope, we’ll be having none of that noise. So, if a social situation got the better of you and you bailed, it’s okay. It’s not the end of the world. 

And, so what if you couldn’t make any new friends this time? At least you left your comfort zone and showed up for yourself—and that’s enough. So reward yourself with a Didn’t Cry Today sweatshirt or a Self-Care Mug. You deserve it!

Accept social invitations. 

I know, I know. The thought of mingling makes the introvert in you scream. But love, you have to put yourself out there if you want to form strong friendships! Maybe hit up your neighbor’s book club or tag along to trivia night with a coworker. Just take baby steps and practice social skills by saying YES to all those invites. All you need is a little confidence, which you can learn more about in the episode of Twenty Whatever called Self Confidence & Dealing with Insecurities. The more you show up for yourself despite your nerves, the easier it’ll get!

Initiate plans. 

We’ve been talking a lot about putting ourselves out there and accepting invites. But, another way to expand your crew is occasionally taking the initiative to plan fun hangouts yourself. It could be something casual, like a brunch or a trip to the movies (or a play date if you’re looking for those mom friends!), but it shows people that you value them and the connection. 

Plus, if you pick something you like to do, it’ll help you stay relaxed! You’ll feel safe and comfortable doing whatever you plan, because you’ll know what to expect. Remember, people like being asked! So, think of people you’ve connected with in class or at the coffee shop that you’d enjoy getting to know better and ask them if they want to hang sometime. 

Practice anxiety-relieving exercises.

Even if you spend a lot of time preparing yourself for social situations, you’ll probably still encounter anxious feelings. When they come, chase them away with proven anxiety-relieving exercises. Try deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, a little exercise, or even mindful meditation! If that last one is totally new to you, listen to the episode of Life with Marianna called Meditation and Sound Bath for Anxiety and Stress and the episode of Dear Gabby called How to Soothe Everyday Anxiety!

Listen to relevant podcasts that give tips. 

Another good way to keep refining your social skills and squashing that anxiety is listening to relevant podcast episodes! What you input, is what you output, so the more you consume media that fuels you with good vibes and confidence, that’s what you’ll exude! So, here are some of our fave anxiety-relieving podcasts that give you practical advice and encouragement to find yourself socially:

• Life Changing Episode To Heal Anxiety Once & For All with The Anxiety MD Dr. Russell Kenned – Soul on Fire
• For the Girls with No Friends – Trying Not to Care
• Anxiety, Managing Friendships, and Career Advice – Conversations with Cam
• How to Deal with Anxiety – Pretty Basic 
• Learning to Become Unbothered – Trying Not to Care
• How to Master Emotions, Manage Stress & Anxiety, & Get Unstuck – Him & Her
• Loneliness in leveling Up, Dealing with Anxiety, & Focusing on Yourself – Note to Self 

Speak to a therapist. 

Okay, we’ve all realized at this point that EVERYONE needs therapy. But, social anxiety is actually a great thing to discuss with your therapist! If you don’t already have one, definitely seek a mental health professional, because they can help you totally unpack your unhealthy coping mechanisms and handle the negative self-talk. Then, you can recap with them how each social encounter goes and start reframing how you view the world and how you build your growing community! 

Maintain the friendship. 

Making friends is only half the battle. The only way to cement those bonds is to put some effort into maintaining them, especially since socializing does not come naturally. We’re talking routine check-ins, initiating quality time together, engaging in their social media posts, celebrating each other’s wins, and, yes, making eye contact when you’re talking to them! Best friends Kristen and Alex discuss this in detail in Adult Friendships (How to Make, Break, or Maintain Them) on their podcast Oddvice. Listen, learn, and before you know it, you’ll find your ride or die! 

Social anxiety is out, authentic friendships are in! 

As we wrap things up, we want to leave you with one final message—you’ve got this! Some days, that anxious little voice in your head will insist otherwise and try to hold you back from living your best social life, but remember, you are deserving and capable of finding genuine friendships. Your BFF is out there waiting for you! 

If you ever need extra guidance or support, your besties at Dear Media are here for you. Our blog and podcasts are full of helpful info and support to keep you reaching your goals! Plus, our relatable podcasters always get super real about their own journeys, too, so you’re never alone.

Meet Victoria Garrick –  an inspiring former Division I volleyball player, TED Talk speaker, advocate, and podcast host of Real Pod. Victoria’s advocacy focuses on body-image, body-confidence, and all things mental health. In her podcast, she sits down with all sorts of special guests to talk about life, successes, failures, challenges, and more! Victoria isn’t afraid to be vulnerable, and the heart-to-heart conversations she has each week highlight the ins and outs of living an authentic life. Real Pod is raw, real, and one the best mental health podcasts around. Check out the top ten best Real Pod episodes below!

The 10 Best Real Pod Episodes

I’M ENGAGED

Get to know more about podcast host, Victoria, in this top ranking episode of Real Pod! Victoria gives listeners an inside look at her personal life. She tells funny and relatable stories and reveals her recent engagement to her long-time love, Max. In fact, we love kicking off these best of lists with something more personal. What’s more personal than an engagement? So in this episode, you’ll really get to know Viktoria and the man she’s marrying!

Sports Illustrated Model Reveals Body-Image Issues & The Truth Behind Perfect Photos: Emily DiDonato

In this episode, Victoria gets real with Sports Illustrated model, Emily DiDonato. Emily has been featured on the cover of Vogue and modeled for fashion icons like Giorgio Armani, Chanel, and Louis Vuitton. Victoria and Emily discuss body-image, battling insecurities, rejection, and also the truth behind those perfectly edited images…

Post-Olympic Depression, Student Athlete Mental Health, & Discussing Body-Image w/ Runner Alexi Pappas

Alexi Pappas is a former 2x All-American and Olympic runner that has been featured by The New York Times, The Rolling Stones, and NPR. Victoria sits down with Alexi to talk about post-Olympic depression, body-image, the mental health issues that commonly affect collegiate athletes, and also how to set and achieve goals.

Peloton Instructor Kendall Toole: How She Overcame Her Mental Health Battles & Started Living Life to the Fullest (2021 Motivation)

Kendall Toole is a Peloton instructor and mental health advocate who is also known for her inspiring and uplifting personality on social media! In this deep and emotional episode, Victoria and Kendall Toole sit down to talk about mental health, Kendall’s battle with severe depression and OCD, and living life to the fullest.

Binge Eating & Overeating – How to Stop the Cycle of Shame & Start Accepting Your Body with Jessi Jean

Are you ready to have a healthier relationship with food? If so, this is definitely the episode for you! Jessi Jean is an Eating Psychology Coach who helps women overcome unhealthy eating habits, disorders, and the cycle of shame. In addition, you’ll hear about Jessi Jean’s own struggle with food. And also tips you can use to break the cycle and gain back your confidence!

My Eating Disorder Story + Answering Your Questions

In this raw and honest episode, Victoria opens up about her personal struggle with an eating disorder. And she gets into it. You’ll learn all about herstruggles and how it affected her life. She also answers questions from listeners about her struggles and how she has moved to a healthier lifestyle since.

Overcoming Fear Foods, Recovering From Binge Eating, & Opening Up To Your S/O About Your Eating Disorder with Influencer Kylie Katich

Kylie Katich is an influencer and photographer with over 350,000 followers on Instagram. She is hilarious, super relatable, and the special guest of this episode of Real Pod. Victoria and Kylie talk about eating disorders, managing insecurities, steps to recovery, and how Kylie manages such a successful Instagram page.

Intuitive Eating on Thanksgiving & How To Navigate Food Around the Holidays with Nutrition Therapist Elyse Resch

Ready to learn how to eat more intuitively? Meet Elyse Resch, author of Intuitive Eating and The Intuitive Eating Workbook, certified eating disorder RN, and a fellow of the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics. Elyse and Victoria talk about all things food, eating for what your body needs (not wants!), and how to keep a healthy diet during the holidays.

Feeling Burnt Out? Life Coach Erin Treloar Shares How to Re-Charge & Reset (+Reflections for the 70% of Women Who Struggle With Disordered Eating!)

Introducing the one and only, Erin Treloar. Erin is a certified health and life coach and the founder of Raw Beauty Company! In this episode, Victoria and Erin sit down to talk about pesky diet culture, what it’s like to be a teenager with an eating disorder, and Erin’s “Raw Beauty Reset” program. Her program has shown success in helping women overcome unhealthy relationships with food and reach their greatest potential…this is not the episode to miss if you’re looking for one of the best confidence boosting podcasts around!

Eating Disorder Recovery: The Realities of Repairing Your Relationship with Food & Learning to Like Yourself With Alex Light

Get ready to dive deep into toxic diet culture in this episode of Real Pod. Alex Light is an influencer with over 300,000 followers. So she’s crushing the social game! She is seriously inspiring. Alex promotes body-confidence and self-love. She speaks out against body-shaming and all things diet culture. We love it. Victoria and Alex sit down to talk about their shared difficulties with eating disorders, how they developed new relationships with their bodies and food, and how to feel good about yourself!

BONUS EPISODE: Katie Defeo – Haters, Ride or Die Friends, and Why Everything Happens For A Reason

Admittedly, we had a hard time narrowing down our faves to just ten episodes. So we’re sharing a couple more. First, in one of the most downloaded episodes of Real Pod, Victoria sits down with USC Lacrosse player and YouTuber Katie Defeo to discuss Defeo’s break from social media to protect her mental health. Defeo also gushes about her super tight friend group, how her besties have impacted her life, and why, sometimes, sacrifice is the key to success.

BONUS EPISODE: Career Advice: 6 Ways to Be More Successful

We all want to be successful, right? This episode might hold the secret to achieving success! Tune in to hear Victoria’s top-tier business and career advice. She reveals the things that have helped her be successful in her own career, and how to cultivate a growth mindset to achieve success in your own life. No matter what your goals are, this episode is a must-listen.

Where You Can Find MORE of the Best Real Pod Episodes:

Real Pod is the perfect podcast if you’re looking for ways to improve your mental health. Victoria and her lineup of open, honest, and interesting guests are always sharing ways to improve your life and overall state of mind. Many of Victoria’s guests, including Victoria herself, have faced difficult challenges throughout their life. They all have tons of raw and relatable advice for those facing similar challenges. When you’re ready to dive deep with Victoria, just click any one of the top ten episodes above to get started! Victoria releases new episodes each and every Wednesday and you can listen to Real Pod on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and at Dear Media. And as always, don’t forget to let us know which episode is your favorite below!

Friends are important no matter what stage of life you’re in. But once you become a mama, it can change your social game—hello, early bedtimes and constant snuggles. While our kids are our world, we mamas need other amazing women who get what it’s like raising these incredible little humans. They need to get everything from the joys of motherhood like cute smiles and rolling giggles to challenges of motherhood like managing sleep regressions and pumping schedules.

Let’s face it, making friends as an adult is already hard enough. Now try adding time to meet new people into our already jam-packed days and nights. Between story time sessions, sleep training, doctor’s appointments, birthday parties, music classes, and everything else, squeezing in time to socialize can feel impossible. That’s why you need a supportive community of fellow mothers. Luckily, we’ve got you covered with practical tips to put yourself out there and meet other super moms effortlessly. Plus, you can listen to the episode of Conversations with Cam called Championing Your Fellow Mothers.

Who’s ready to expand their friend circle?

How To Make Mom Friends

Join online parenting communities.

Raise your hand if you’re part of at least one baby/parenting group on social media. These virtual mom clubs can be a lifesaver for everything from quick baby feeding tips to snagging last-minute playdate partners. But, they’re also one of the easiest ways to find your new mom-bestie. 

You can find other mamas online through these parenting forums and Facebook groups. When you join a mom’s group, you can get a quick taste of what these other moms are like by simply checking their profiles. And, if you dig what you see, you can start a conversation. Easy peasy.

Say “hi” to your neighbors.

Do you ever look out your front window and wonder about the parents of the other kids running around the neighborhood? Well, now is your chance to find out. The neighbor woman ladies you smile and wave to while gardening or walking the kids might just turn out to be your kinda gal. So, next time you cross paths, why not wander over and introduce yourself or invite them over to the porch for a glass of wine and a gossip sesh while the kids are asleep? All it takes is a simple “Hello” and some small talk. You never know where it could lead!

Volunteer at your kids’ school.

We know what you’re thinking: how can we find time to help out teachers on top of everything else? Seriously, like our girl Sarah Nicole discusses in this episode of The Papaya Podcast, life harmony with relationships is tough! But hear us out. Signing up to help out with a school party, field trip, or fundraiser is an easy way to meet other moms. We know it might take extra time, which seems scarce these days, but we promise it’s worth making room in your schedule. Not only will you be a rockstar to the teachers with an extra set of hands, but you’ll also meet tons of local moms going through the same drop-offs and recitals as you. 

Schedule a mom brunch.

If you’re a young hot mama juggling little ones, hosting a casual momma brunch is an easy way to score potential BFFs. Besides, who doesn’t love an excuse for mimosas and macaroons?! This is the perfect low-key way to build a little MILF crew (You can even rock these hot mama hats and crews.) All you need is a fun location with a fun kid’s area, then invite that neighbor you’ve said “Hi” to, the other moms at school you’ve begun speaking with, or the moms at your mommy and me classes. You can find mamas anywhere!  

Schedule playdates at the park.

It can be a tad frustrating trying to make new friends or maintain your already growing friendship community while keeping our littles busy and occupied. Stassi and her fellow mom bestie discuss the episode of her podcast called The Kids Are Finally Asleep & It’s Martini Time.  But, you can kill two birds with one stone by scheduling play dates at the park. There, your little ones will be occupied playing and you’ll have enough free time to meet other moms who might also be looking for their people. It’s also a good place, once you find your mom besties, to bond and strengthen your friendships while keeping an eye on the kids. 

Start a mom blog/podcast.

It’s okay if you’re not the extroverted type and would prefer to make friends from the comfort of your home. We have the solution for you: start that blog or podcast you’ve been dreaming of! You can share your experiences of motherhood with others trying to navigate that new identity. You can also interview fellow creative moms for your podcast or feature them on your blog. It’s such an easy way to build friendships and a community of moms who uplift one another. Besides, when you’re ready to share your compelling story with the world, Dear Media is here to give you all the inspo! 

Offer to carpool.

Between all the school drop-offs, activities, and general errand running that comes with motherhood, our cars basically become our second homes. Why not turn all that time behind the wheel into an opportunity to make a new friend by offering up your co-pilot seat? The next time you chat with your neighbor whose kid goes to the same school, you can offer to take turns carpooling. You’ll save gas money and have time to catch up on the way. Soon, playdates will start planning themselves. 

Don’t be shy.

Confidence is the most important step in making friends. You must be able to step out of your comfort zone and summon the courage to speak to other moms, especially if you’re the shy type. And even though putting yourself out there when you’re not feeling your most confident can be scary, you only need to push past that inner critic and just go for the hello! 

We know it’s hard, but community is SO important. For more on why, definitely dive into the episode of Soul on Fire called Human Design Deep Dive on Relationships, Parenthood, Friendship, & Beyond. It’s human nature to have friends, even as a mom. So, get out there and start by giving little compliments here and there. Then take it a step further by asking where they got their snacks or an outfit for their little ones. Before you know it, you’ll be well on your way to becoming besties. Still need a push??? Listen to these confidence boosting podcasts!

It takes a village, guys! Find your new moms squad with these tips!

Well, mamas, we’ve covered some effective ways to expand your mom circle, from online communities to meetups at the park. We’ve all been the new girl trying to fit in at some point. So don’t be afraid to say those hellos, send out those invites, or step outside those comfort zones, and put yourself out there, even on days when it seems easier to feel lonely. 

Remember, there are so many incredible women just like you who are also looking for friends to lean on, vent to, and create special memories with. Your kids also benefit when you put in the effort to find your people. Your ideal mom squad is out there, and they can’t wait to meet the fabulous mama you are, too.

Check out our blog and podcasts for more tips on parenthood, friendships, community, and other advice. And, never forget that you’re doing AMAZING! Reward yourself with a Raising Good Humans sweatshirt, a moody mug, your fave drink, and a Bravo show. You deserve it!

Regular relationships are hard . . . long-distance relationships are really hard. No matter who you are, living hours and hours away from your partner can be extremely taxing on a relationship. Making time for one another and keeping the romance alive take real effort. However, 60% of long-distance relationships actually work out—apparently absence does make the heart grow fonder!

Okay, but those that make it work, how the heck do they do it? It takes more than lively phone calls to keep things exciting with a long distance partner. So, today, we’re sharing some strategies to spice up a long distance relationship and keep the love strong. If you’d rather listen to some great tips, tune into the episode of Note to Self called Nice Guy Paradox, Spicing Up a Long-Distance Relationship, & Dreading the Big Move. It’s got seriously THE BEST advice! 

Here’s our long distance dating tips:

How To Spice Up A Long Distance Relationship 

There are a lot of challenges in long-distance relationships. It’s so easy to feel lonely, encounter miscommunications, struggle with schedule differences, and lose that sense of intimacy. For a successful long-distance relationship, you need trust, commitment, patience, support, and intentionality. 

So, can long distance relationships really work? Let’s chat about it! 

 Can Long Distance Relationships Work?

YES! It can totally work. Like we mentioned earlier, 60% of relationships survive the long distance thing, which are pretty good odds! If you’re serious about your long-distance S.O., don’t let the miles between you ruin a good thing. You just need to develop a good strategy of handling the distance for now. Hopefully, you’ll be reunited again soon! 

If you need an example of long-distance couples that made it, listen to the episode of The Dream Bigger Podcast called Starting a Brand with Revolve, Long Distance Relationships to Marriage, Balancing Multiple Business and More and the episode of Note to Self called Long-Distance Relationships Tips, Conspiracy Theories, & Our 5-Year Plan with Joe Ross. Guys, this can totally work if you just keep things fresh!

How To Spice Things Up A Long Distance Relationship

Here’s exactly how to put the spark back in your long distance relationship!

Get creative with virtual date nights. 

We all learned how to have a good time on video call after COVID, so it’s time to apply those FaceTime skills to your dating life! Instead of just talking, do something together in real time. You could simultaneously cook a meal, complete a craft, do a workout, play board games, try and drink homemade cocktails, or even hunt for dream homes. Who doesn’t like to browse multi-million dollar homes on Zillow??? 

The point is, plan activities you can do together that’ll not only give you the chance to connect, but make lasting memories like you would if you lived in the same city! 

Send each other themed care packages. 

Everyone loves a thoughtful gift. It’s hard to support our S.O. from afar, but themed care packages are a great way to do it. If they’re starting a new job, send them stuff for their office, a gift card for new clothes, and a few celebratory snacks! (Oh, and don’t forget a picture of you for their new desk.) 

Or, if they’re sick, overnight a care package with tissues, herbal tea, soup, a cozy blanket, a book, and a sweet note. If you don’t have a specific theme in mind, just make it an “I Miss You” care package like this “Back Soon” cap, a framed photo of the two of you, their favorite snacks, a pair of the softest socks EVER, and maybe a crewneck with your city on it! (From Austin or LA??? The Dear Media Shop has you covered!)

Play online games together. 

Video games are another good strategy to have quality time with your long-distance partner in a totally fun, relaxing, and low-maintenance way. And, no, you don’t have to be a “gamer girl” to find a game that you like. There are so many simple, cute collaborative games for couples like It Takes Two, Stardew Valley, or Minecraft! If you’re competitive, your relationship might survive Overcooked, but, be prepared. Your video chat is going to sound like an episode of The Bear. 

Send surprise flowers or gift deliveries. 

Sending surprise flowers or gift deliveries is the perfect way to establish a sense of closeness. Even if you’re far away, you can call a florist or other delivery business to send your S.O. a gift the same day. So, it’s a great way to be spontaneous and show them you’re thinking about them all the time. 

Start a movie or book club.

Another good way of connecting with a long distance partner is by reading books or watching a movie or TV show together! You can watch stuff together in real time with Kast and discuss it while you watch (and afterwards, of course.) May we suggest a Bravo show??? The drama provides the perfect foundation for some great convos. 

If you’re more of a reading time, basically start a book club! Choose a book, read it on your own, and then call to discuss! If you’re not sure what books to read, you can follow along with The Readheads. Then listening to the podcast can be another thing you do together! 

Listen to a podcast. 

Everyone loves those relationships where you can just have the video call open while you each do your own thing. It almost feels like your long distance partner is right there with you. Instead of sitting in silence, listen to a podcast together! It creates a sense of togetherness and gives you something to talk about later even when neither one of you are feeling particularly social. For podcast recs, here’s some of the best podcasts for couples!

Send flirty texts. 

Thinking about your partner throughout the day? Let them know with a flirty text. It establishes a sense of intimacy and keeps that connection alive even from afar. And, hopefully they’ll send a flirty text back and things will get really exciting. Want more on that? Listen to the episode of Ex Virgin called Sexting and Riding Tips From a True Professional.

Write each other love letters. 

There is something so romantic about handwritten letters sent through the mail. No matter what is written, it strengthens your emotional connection. It takes time and a lot of thought to curate and send a love letter—it’s the perfect tradition for a long-distance couple! You can grab a few greeting cards from the DM Shop like this ILYSM Card or this You’ll Do Card.

Create a shared playlist. 

Here’s another simple way to feel connected to your S.O. when you’re far away from them. Create a shared playlist that you both add music to. It’s an easy way to share your interests, feelings, and time with your partner! 

Have a boudoir photoshoot.

Obviously, if you’re thousands of miles apart, you’re not having sex every night. That lack of intimacy can weigh on some couples, but you can definitely spice things up with a sex photoshoot! Find a boudoir photographer in your area, make a photobook of the pics, and then send them to your partner! (Or, you could send them digitally!) 

Experiment with phone sex. 

Though there’s physical distance, it doesn’t mean you can’t have a physical relationship. Maintain a sense of intimacy with phone sex! Or, you know, there’s plenty you can do one video chat, too. 😉 Ask your partner what they want to do, and listen to this episode of We Met At Acme and this episode of The Papaya Podcast about sex and virtual relationships! 

Plan your next visit. 

At some point you’re going to see each other again! It makes it easier to deal with not being physically close if you spend time planning your next visit. Knowing when you’re going to get to hold your S.O. again will help combat those lonely days! Listen to the episode of Note to Self called Travel Hacks, Long-Distance Tips & Staying Independent in a Relationship to plan your trip and get long distance relationship advice!

Spice up your long-distance relationship with these tips!

Distance SUCKS. We all wish we could stay close to our partners. But, if you find yourself in a long-distance relationship, you can definitely make it work. Just be intentional with your time and your love will know no distance!

Want more on long-distance relationships??? Check out these podcast episodes:

• Getting Over a Guy You Didn’t Date, Long-Distance Breakups & Holding Grudges in Your Relationship – Note to Self 
• Setting Boundaries, Long-Distance Advice, & Hooking Up with Guy Friends – Note to Self
• Infidelity, Long Distant Relationships, & More Advice – What We Said

We’re all for living in the moment. We’re also big on goal setting. How can that be? Aren’t they contradictory? NO! Living in the moment and setting goals for your future complement each other. You can work toward your goals while staying present. The most important thing is starting with clear goals, so that from there you can live each day in the present knowing you’re getting closer to achieving them.

One of the many reasons we’re big fans of goal setting is because it’s the best way to actually get things done. They make you feel more accountable, don’t you think? Goals can be short or long-term, created and achieved any time of the year, and they may require multiple steps, hard-work, and determination to succeed. This is why it is essential to set clear goals for your life.

You might be wondering…how do I live my life to the fullest? Setting clear goals is one of the first and most important steps to achieving whatever it is that you desire! Creating clear goals gives you a sense of direction, helps you see the bigger picture, and provides the motivation you need to keep going. It’s all about learning how to focus on what really matters. So with that being said, today we are sharing tips for how to set clear goals in life and ultimately achieve any goal you set your mind to!

How To Set Clear Goals In Life

First, decide what you want.

There are many different types of goals that you can set for yourself and your life. So first things first, you’ve got to decide what you want! Make a list of things you want to accomplish, experience, become, or learn. Set your intentions and visualize your future self. From there, you can set realistic life goals that move the needle closer to those things. You can set goals related to career or business. Or set personal goals like saving money, exercising more, or eating healthier. Din’t be afraid to set important goals that involve developing better relationships with the people around you. Even more, you can set both short-term goals and long-term goals as well.

Are you one of those people who has no idea what they want, but you know you need a change? We got you covered! For some inspiration about how to figure out what the heck you want from life, we recommend checking out these podcast episodes to help get you started: Romanticizing Your Life, Fitness Journey and Having the Courage to Change Your Mind About What You Want and Where You Want to Be from House Guest with Kenzie Elizabeth.

Set SMART Goals:

As you’re setting goals for yourself, you want to make sure that your goals are smart and realistically achievable. S.M.A.R.T is a well-known mnemonic device and goal setting theory that can help guide you through the creation of good quality goals. In this episode of the Dream Bigger Podcast with special guest Laura Davidson, you can find some great examples of SMART goals. Each letter of SMART stands for a different quality that your goal should have…a SMART goal is specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and time-based.

So let’s break this down real quick:

Specific:

Goals that are too general can quickly start to feel overwhelming and seem unachievable, so always make sure your goal is specific and detailed.  So rather than the goal of “exercising more” shoot for something like “walk for 30 minutes twice per week, take a spin class once per week, and do weight training once per week.” Get SPECIFIC.

Measurable:

Making measurable goals is important because it is easier to set deadlines and track progress.

Attainable:

Of course, your goal should always be attainable. Wild and far fetched goals, while exciting, can be harder to achieve and lead to undue stress and disappointment. To hear more about attainable goal setting, check out: Maggie MacDonald – Alcohol, Personal Growth, Health and Wellness, Motivation for 2021 & Setting Goals from House Guest with Kenzie Elizabeth.

Relevant:

Be sure that your goals are worth-while and relevant to your life and overall state of mind.

Time-Bound (or Time-Based):

And last but not least, it’s important to make your goals time-based so that you can follow your progress and look forward to when you achieve life goals within a specific time frame.

Create a Plan of Action:

Now that you know what you want to achieve, it’s time to create a clear plan of action to reach your goal! Creating a detailed and measurable plan is key to ensuring your success and a great way to do this is by simply writing it down. Get your pen and notepad, write your goal, and then write out the steps it will take to get you there! As you write out your steps, be sure to keep the SMART principles in mind and create deadlines, schedule time to achieve tasks, and create milestones that can help you track your progress. This is effective goal setting!

You may also want to take some time to listen to some podcast episodes that detail how to plan and achieve your goals. Some episodes we recommend are Interview with NYT Best Selling Author Ryan Holiday Who Talks Stoicism, Courage, & How To Set Goals from Real Pod and this two-part episode from The Skinny Confidential Him & Her Podcast: Part 1: Ed Mylett – Peak Performance, How To Achieve Your Goals, Vulnerability, & How To Recover During Tough Times followed up by Part 2: How To Achieve Your Goals, Enjoy Success, Strive For More, & Hold Yourself Accountable, All While Avoiding Burnout.

Track Your Progress:

As mentioned earlier, tracking your progress is super helpful as you set and achieve your goals. Setting deadlines and milestones can help keep you motivated, keep you on the right track, and steer you away from distractions and delays. Check out this episode of What We Said for some great tips on how to stay motivated and self discipline. They also explain why a routine can make all the difference when you’re figuring out how to shift your mindset and stay focused. There are many ways you can track your progress like making lists, utilizing calendars and phone reminders, or even downloading goal tracking apps like Strides or Way of Life. No matter how you choose to track your progress, just remember to make each step clear, concise, and achievable.

Celebrate!

Achieving goals is all about better yourself and learning how to fall in love with yourself and your life. As you achieve each milestone and eventually, your end goal, remember to give yourself some time to celebrate! Congrats – you did it! And now, you deserve a little stress-free, feel good break from all that hard work and determination. As well as celebrating, remember to take some time to reflect, give thanks, and spread the good vibes!

How to Set Clear Goals in Your Life

Setting and achieving goals can seem so much more daunting when your goals aren’t clear and concise. It is so easy to get discouraged and give up when your goals seem so far away and you’re dealing with uncertainty. This is why setting clear goals is key! Creating clear goals in your life can make achieving your goals easier and faster without all the hassle of unneeded stress and emotions. Setting clear goals is also a great opportunity to learn how and why to get out of your comfort zone and try something new!

There is no need to get overwhelmed…accomplishing goals can be a breeze if you simply take the time to make sure your goals are clear, SMART, and achievable! If you have any questions or thoughts you’d like to share, feel free to comment below! And as you work on setting clear goals, you can always feel free to come back and reference the goal setting tips in this blog to help get you back on track. Good luck – we know you can do it!